As Yoda Would Say… Soccer Mom, I Am Not


Okay, Yoda never said anything like that but if he had to use his car as a free taxi service and shuffle his kids around from activity to activity while they whined about being hungry, tired, mad about being rushed out of the door because they’re moving as slooow as slugs, etc., he’d be over that shit pretty quick.

Let me just start by saying, my 6 year-old hummingbird has a natural athletic ability that leaves me so proud and in absolute awe. Like I tell others, she may be small but my girl has spunk.

And yes, while I can say no to her doing an extracurricular activity, it can sneak up on me and before I know it, she’s involved in a buttload of things.

I’m all for the other activities she does… except soccer. For some reason, it makes me irrationally stabby. I’m fine with her gymnastics class, especially after being rid of the Type A mom master, and I love her ice skating classes. It doesn’t hurt that her dad usually takes her to ice skating while I’m snoozing in my warm and cozy bed. But, just like last year, I dread being a “soccer mom”.

Don’t get me wrong, I love seeing my little girl kick some ass on the field. I just find it much more pleasant watching her play soccer in our backyard. She’s more confident about being on a soccer team this year which is awesome and helps soothe my nerves since I don’t have to drag her kicking and screaming to her soccer games. I just find myself being the one who gets whiny when it comes to going to soccer practice and games this time around.

I don’t want to sit my ass out in the hot sun… soon to be the freezing cold and rain and snow… for an hour. I don’t want to be outside when I can be lounging on my couch on a Saturday morning, reading my mindless and very welcome US Weekly without pants and a bra. I don’t want to sign up for snack duty and feed 10 kids instead of just my own.

What’s up with that anyway? When I participated in sports as a kid, I felt like I won the snack lottery from saving my allowance and scoring a hot dog at the snack shack at the little league baseball field. Even a cup of cold water from a thermos that my coach brought along made me feel like I struck gold.

So, in other words, BAH-FUCKING-HUMBUG, soccer!

Who knows, maybe the little hummingbird won’t want to bother with soccer next year. One can hope. In the meantime, I will start pinning plenty of varieties of spiked hot chocolate to possibly take along with me to upcoming soccer games.

That’s what I call getting into the spirit of the game. Yeah, such a bad pun. Ahem, I’ll see myself out.


Comments { 5 }

The Likeness Is Uncanny

Well, look at that! Donald Trump is on the cover.


I already shared this fabulous photo of the misogynistic pig on my FB page, but couldn’t resist posting it here.

And if you need some brain bleach, here you go…

*The hummingbird and I can’t get enough of this song.

Comments { 2 }


Long time, no see. I took an unexpected break since I went into an awful funk back in March. Depression pretty much body slammed me and put me in a headlock for a bit. It was being such a dick but I’m slowly climbing out of the hole I was in.

With my 6 year-old being on summer break and the chaos of moving last month and endless unpacking, I haven’t had much time… to pull my ass away from marathons of The Walking Dead and the delicious show, UnReal.

I’m hoping to get back into the swing of things once the hummingbird goes back to school in a few weeks. When she started kindergarten last year, I was freaking the hell out because Oh my god, my baby is growing up!!! But now, I’m counting down the days until she starts 1st grade.

I want to break out the hard liquor, get some glow sticks, and have myself a dance party on that glorious day.

Who am I kidding? I’m going to cry like a fucking baby because Oh my god, my baby is growing up!!!

I came across this video with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and it is glorious. “I’m sorry I ruffled your duvet but I had to work on that bootay”.


What were you up to this summer? Has your sanity been hanging by a thread from summer vacation?

Comments { 3 }

Guiltless Sour Cream And Chicken Enchiladas

Photo Credit: Macaroni and Cheesecake

Photo Credit: Macaroni and Cheesecake

I’ve been eating healthier-ish while still eating the things I love, just less of it. I usually crave Mexican food and these enchiladas are so great and satisfying. Enjoy!

(Tip: One enchilada is approx. 275 calories and 8 grams of fat.)


  • • 16 oz. fat-free sour cream
  • • 1 can low-fat or fat-free cream of chicken soup
  • • 1 tablespoon fresh chopped cilantro (1/2 tbsp. dried… but splurge on the fresh stuff because yum)
  • • 2 1/2 cups cooked shredded chicken breast
  • • 1 can Mexican Rotel
  • • 8 low carb tortillas
  • • 1 cup shredded monterey jack and colby cheese blend
  • • 1 can diced green chiles (I don’t care for them and leave them out)


In a saucepan, mix together sour cream, soup and cilantro on medium heat. This may start to boil quickly and make a hot mess if you don’t keep stirring. Heat through and set aside.

Combine the chicken, rotel, and green chiles in a pan sprayed with cooking spray.

Warm for a few minutes to blend the flavors and juices. Warm the tortillas until flexible. I microwave them for 10 seconds sandwiched between two damp paper towels.

Fill each tortilla with about 2 tbsp. of the chicken mixture. Top with about 1/2-1 tablespoon of cheese. Roll the tortilla up and place seam side down in a baking dish sprayed with cooking spray.

Pour the sour cream sauce over enchiladas. Top with the remaining cheese. Bake at 350°F for 25-30 minutes until bubbly and cheese is melted.

Comments { 1 }

Hyperemesis Gravidarum

Since I had hyperemesis gravidarum with my first pregnancy, with the little hummingbird, I’ve called it “that Harry Potter sounding spell”. I’ve since had it with each pregnancy and let me say this.

It is NOT “bad morning sickness”.

HG isn’t anywhere in the same category. One of the ways that I’ve tried to describe it to my husband is that it’s like comparing a paper cut on your finger to breaking your hand.

I much rather refer to hyperemesis gravidarum as extreme pregnancy sickness. Not that morning sickness is a walk in the park but HG is horrible and something I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

While I was thankfully never hospitalized for it, last year when I was pregnant, it was agony for many months. The only thing that I could really keep down was iced tea lemonade and I remember how my ob/gyn became really concerned when I lost over 10 pounds in just a few weeks.

As far as my experience with it, something as simple as water is completely and utterly repulsive when you have HG. Even smelling water was horrible. Yes, water had a smell to me.

Sounds and movement even aggravate HG. Like when I would lay on the couch and my daughter would hop around by me. I would be in agony. Or I would still be in bed and my husband would be talking to the hummingbird and his deep voice would seem amplified and actually make me sick.

Hyperemesis gravidarum is like when you drink too much and get the spins and say “I’m never drinking again”. But instead, you have this awful motion sickness feeling 24/7 for several months.

Pregnancy should be such a happy time. Being excited about seeing the beautiful life that you’ve created and hopeful when it comes to the future with your child.

Every single day, I felt like I wanted to die when it came to having HG. Sure, I thought I would die because of how sick I felt. But at times, I would think being dead would be much better than dealing with the day-to-day sickness that was completely overwhelming when it comes to having hyperemesis gravidarum.

The so-called “happy time” in my life was such a nightmare for me. I tried everything possible to help with this awful pregnancy sickness. I’m allergic to the more common anti-nausea medication but would take another kind and still, it did very little to ease the HG.

Nothing helped my issue with hyperemesis gravidarum.

I have given so much thought when it comes to having another child because of dealing with hyperemesis gravidarum. It’s truly the hardest decision I’ve had to make. Especially with having a 6 year-old to care for.

Despite wanting to have another child more than anything in the world, having HG with my last pregnancy was more brutal than the previous times and that concerns me.

Time is ticking away to try one last time. I’ve been trying to convince myself that it will be perfectly fine if I just have one child. It makes me feel ungrateful at times to want another, especially when so many people go through heartache and many years to try for a baby.

But honestly, I long to have another child… even if it means my head will be in the toilet for 9 months.

Comments { 6 }

Yours Is Better

Be forewarned. This is a mash-up of things going on. Scratching your head while thinking “what the fuck?” and confusion may follow. Other side effects may include drowsiness, irritability, and dizziness. If you have an erection lasting more than 3 hours, please consult a medical professional.

Okay, I thought I’d just throw in the last one. Ya know, to see if you’re paying attention.

My daughter and I picked up the same cheese quesadillas and took them home. She was STARVING and had to have hers right away. I had a few things to do around the house that took longer than I thought aka “Mom, can you please give me a drink! My food’s cold now. Can you heat it up? I need to poop first. Now it’s cold again”, laundry, putting away the groceries, etc.

She took a few nibbles out of it and left the quesadilla sitting there for half an hour. The bird told me she was done and threw it away. Once I was finally able to sit down and eat, guess who was STARVING again and had to eat my food?

I asked my 6 year-old what was so different about mine and she let me know that mine tasted much better. I ended up eating some peanut butter m n m’s for lunch and my kid caught me. So, not only did she eat my cheese quesadilla, she found that I had a secret stash of chocolate.


We finally found a house and move in 5 weeks. We have one more year here until my husband gets out of the military and then we plan on moving back to the west coast. We have SO much shit to move and it’s been tempting to just take everything out of the house and set it on fire. We haven’t even begun to start packing yet and whenever I start thinking about it, I want to throw a toddler tantrum and yell I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna!


Our cats went to the vet and she put them on a kitty diet. Seeing my husband try to hold each one while standing on the scale to see if they’ve lost any weight while they wiggle around is pretty entertaining. I don’t know how to give them more exercise than they already get by chasing each other around the house like maniacs.

There should be an exercise dvd for pets. The closest one of my cats comes to exercise is lying on my exercise mat while I’m working out.


I’ve been throwing myself into books more than normal and even try to put the bird to bed earlier since she can’t tell time yet. Win!

I’ve been reading these books and hopefully you may come across one you like… :)

 The Light Between Oceans – M.L. Stedman

The Girl On The Train – Paula Hawkins

To Selena, With Love – Chris Perez

Yes Please – Amy Poehler

Needful Things – Stephen King

Mrs. Kennedy And Me – Clint Hill

Confessions Of A Praire Bitch: How I Survived Nellie Oleson and Learned to Love Being Hated – Alison Arngrim

The White Mountains (The Tripods) – John Christopher

Short story long. When I was 13, my English teacher assigned the class to read this book. I wasn’t really into science fiction and since I was a kid, I dreaded having to read anything other than V.C. Andrews. I was surprised by how much I liked this book and the whole trilogy.

Several years later, this book crossed my mind and I wanted to read it again but I couldn’t freaking remember the name of it. I spent another several years googling or looking up keywords or whatever I could remember about The Tripods but still couldn’t find these books. A few months ago, when I was searching yet again, I found it. Yay! Sure it’s for kids, but I like it just as much as the first time I read it.

What have you been reading?

Comments { 2 }

Book Review: The Husband’s Secret


I’ve been reading so many thrillers and decided it was time to change things up. I came across The Husband’s Secret by Liane Moriarty and while I wasn’t sure what to expect, I found there was more weight to the plot lines than I had expected.

It took a bit to wrap my head around the three main characters, Australian women Cecilia, Tess, and Rachel. But, their stories start to intertwine and at that point, it was hard to put the book down.

Cecilia is a very organized and put together woman with a husband and three daughters. Her life becomes out of sorts the day she comes across an envelope from her husband. The contents of the letter inside are unknown but the words on the envelope ‘only open in the event of my death’ makes Cecilia’s curiosity get the best of her.

Although, out of all the scenarios she ponders, reading the letter and finding out a truth about her husband isn’t anything she could have ever imagined.

Tess thinks she has it made with her husband and young son, Liam. She has a stable and comfortable life until she finds that the people closest to her have been betraying Tess. It puts her in a tailspin and has her going off to Melbourne to stay with her mother. She also comes across an old boyfriend, Connor Whitby, which has Tess conflicted.

Marriage was a form of insanity; love hovering permanently on the edge of aggravation.

Rachel dotes on her toddler grandson, who is her world. Soon, her son and daughter-in-law drop the news that they’re moving to New York City. The thought of no longer living near her grandson is too much to bear.

Rachel is also still reeling from the loss of her teenage daughter many years ago. Her murderer has never been caught but she’s had her eye on a suspect for quite a while. Rachel finds a video that gives her the certainty of her daughter’s killer but convincing the police isn’t so easy.

Should you buy the book? Yes, if you like suspense and mystery. I’ve already downloaded another of the author’s books, Big Little Lies.

*A must see… Thunderstruck – 2Cellos

Comments { 2 }