Halloween is one of my favorite holidays, always has been. Actually any holiday where I have an excuse to stuff my face with candy is my favorite but I really love Halloween. I love the decorations (what other time of the year can you put up a blood splattered zombie on your front door without the neighbors calling the police) and I love seeing little ones in their costumes.
I admit there have been years when my hubby and I have turned off the lights in the house and we’ve pretended not to be home. Now that we have our daughter, we really get into it and love having the neighbor kids knocking on our door in search of candy that their parents will sneak into and eat later on.
Another reason why I love Halloween, my MIL. After 15 years of her making me feel inadequate, saying things that make me cry, and undermining everything I do or say, I discovered a small way to exact some revenge. Do you want to know my secret? Well, I’ll tell you anyway. Duh Duh Duh, it’s revenge by greeting cards.
On most holidays and her birthday I get her an inappropriate card. I should clarify that it’s inappropriate by her standards (not mine) if it doesn’t have rainbows and butterflies and it doesn’t say something very serious. I’ve always liked the somewhat shocking and funny greeting cards and can thank my own mom for that…thanks mom! I don’t remember receiving that many “serious” cards over my lifetime.
I don’t just send these cards to my MIL but to everyone I know. For my FIL’s birthday recently, I sent a card and on the cover it looked like a buttcrack peeking out of underwear i.e plumber’s crack. Inside, it was an ant reading a newspaper. Heh!
The in-laws usually have their church group come over for things like birthdays and holidays. I find it funny that they have to take the card that I send off of their fireplace mantle so the group doesn’t see it.
What’s so great about Halloween is not only do I get to send my MIL an “inappropriate” greeting card but she also hates this holiday. She despises it, thinks it’s the devil’s work, finds it to be evil. She doesn’t even pass out candy to the kids in her neighborhood because it’s “satan’s holiday”. So I get a double whammy when I send her a card for Halloween.
This year the card I sent her has a ghost on the cover and asks “What do you get when you goose a ghost?” Inside it says “A handful of sheet.” I can’t wait to see what’s in store for Thanksgiving. 🙂