When You Wish Upon A Star… And It’s Stuck… Up Where?!

*This is what happens when what part of my mind I had left was lost from spending time with my in-laws.

We are now on our way to spend the rest of the week with my family. Yay! Yesterday while at the in-laws, we were in the living room and my FIL and hubby were in a deep discussion about which is better, east coast or west coast rap.

Just go with me on this.

My MIL got up to grab a newspaper from 1992 that had a very compelling article, swaying people towards east coast rap.

When she was walking over to the newspaper stack, I saw something that shocked me. I finally realized why she has been so mean and insulting to me all of these years.

I can’t believe she’s never talked about this problem. I learned from Dr. Google that this has deeply affected many others over the years.

Most are too ashamed to talk about this but my wish is that they know they’re not alone.

You are not alone. There is help for Christmas stars stuck up someone’s butt.

My MIL has been carrying this around for years and in one second of forgetting who she was, she unclenched and the star was finally free. The Christmas star was pretty shaken up and needed some time alone outside with a few glasses of wine.

Later that night, the star came to me and while he was fuzzy on the details, he thinks his incredibly daunting journey started around Thanksgiving 1970.

He said that before then, he had lost much of his family to this awful problem of “can’t take the stick out-itis”. Star told me that my MIL and her family were in such a rush to get the tree up and untangle the lights.

He thought my MIL saw him lying on the couch and then everything went dark.

After using several handi-wipes and a bottle of disinfectant, he was starting to feel like his old self. I was able to take him to the neighbors who gladly welcomed him into their home. They even promised Star that he can sit on top of their tree for the rest of his days.

Sadly some aren’t as lucky and remain up the butts of many. The solution is simple, unclench. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem to make much of a difference with my MIL.

Then again, a wooden post my in-laws had in their backyard has gone missing. Hmmm……

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10 Responses to When You Wish Upon A Star… And It’s Stuck… Up Where?!

  1. Brooke Farmer November 22, 2010 at 21:57 #

    Awesome, awesome, awesomeness.

    And I am dying to know- does your hubby have your url?

    • Elle November 23, 2010 at 06:19 #

      He knows it but doesn’t read my blog unless I ask him to. I showed him this one and my Thanksgiving posts. No complaints from him because he sees how his mom treats me. 😉

  2. Mandi November 23, 2010 at 18:30 #

    LOL. You are on a roll. I love it!! And the last one, vodka and chocolate? So funny. Hope you enjoy the rest of the week with your family!!

  3. TeeeRay November 28, 2010 at 10:29 #

    Bahahah! Hilarious! Star up the bum – That’s just priceless!

    • Elle December 3, 2010 at 02:08 #

      I’m glad you like it. 🙂

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