Because having a tiny elbow crushing my windpipe is so much fun.

The hubby and hummingbird are close to being over the cold that took over our house but since I got the worst of it, my butt is still dragging but not in the gross way when dogs drag their poopy butts all over the carpet *gag* and I’m playing the sick card with my husband.

Can you throw that basket of laundry in the washer? I’m sooo sick. And can you also run the dishwasher, feed the cat, change the hummingbird’s diaper, check the mail….

I make sure to add a cough and/or groan about my throat being sore.

The last time we were all sick was in November and it was brutal since we had been visiting our families for Thanksgiving and had to fly back home. I always think that since my little girl is sick, she’ll take it down a few notches so I can rest a little but have found that even with a fever, coughing, being congested, and not sleeping at night isn’t going to slow her down.

She was waking up several times a night last week and although my husband and I take turns when she wakes up, at one point I felt like I would drop dead while I was up with her so I brought her into our room and we were laying in bed. The hummingbird was hyper at first but then she cuddled up with me.

She wasn’t much of a cuddler when she was younger but is starting to do that more often which I love. My husband turned around in bed, faced us, and scared the hell out of our daughter because she hadn’t seen him wear the mask of his CPAP machine before. I admit it, I thought her reaction was pretty funny. Yes, I’m a mean mommy.

I tried to convince her that it was just her daddy and he was harmless so I flopped his hand around in a wave and was saying hi in funny voices but neither one of them was very amused.

My hubby had most of the room in our king size bed, our cat was sprawled out the long way by our feet, I had a death grip on the side of the bed so I wouldn’t fall out while my left arm was around my little girl, and she was laying as close to me as possible so she wouldn’t be near that creepy masked man who sounded like Darth Vader.

Then I felt her relaxing against my body so I inched away a little to have some room but she inched towards me. I still had a death grip on the bed and I was laying on top of my right arm which was going numb. My left arm started going numb since the little hummingbird’s head was getting heavier and heavier.

As she was drifting off further into sleep, she was hitting me in the face with her hands. Then she put her hands behind the back of her head and her right elbow was stabbing me in the neck.

I slowly moved my left arm up a little and the feeling started coming back but since her tiny elbow was still jammed into my neck, I tilted my head up and over to the right to try and avoid her pointy, little elbow but it didn’t work.

That gave her more space and her heavy head whacked me in the left cheek while her elbow was still lodged into my neck. While my hubby, the hummingbird, and Maisy the cat slept soundly, I was wide awake and afraid to move a muscle or else I would fall onto the floor.

I wanted to take my little girl back to her room because I was never going to get any sleep this way but she was finally asleep so I couldn’t bear to move her.

My husband solved the problem. He knocked his mask around and it was hissing loudly so I scooted the hummingbird over and nudged my hubby in the arm so he could readjust his mask.

I waited a minute and by then my little girl was waking up to the hissing sound and since the mask wasn’t on right, the hubby was snoring really loud so I took one of his pillows and wacked him in the face. While he was grumbling that I woke him up seriously?, I took the hummingbird back to her room.

I went to take another dose of night-time cold medicine and slipped back into bed.  I was just waiting for her to start crying but she didn’t. Success! While I was finally getting comfy and relaxed, she started crying. I tapped my hubby on the arm and told him your turn.

After my husband got up, I had more room in the bed yipee until our cat, Maisy, came up by my face and sprawled out. At least she was courteous enough to lay face to face and not cat butt to face.

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4 Responses to Because having a tiny elbow crushing my windpipe is so much fun.

  1. Sarah M May 11, 2011 at 07:38 #

    Hilarious!!! My daughter is the same way…she moves so much in her sleep…we only have a Queen sized bed which is plenty big until you put a 3 ft 30lb toddler in it and its like you’ve added a 500 lb bear!!! Who kicks and jabs like she’s trying to escape the grips of the giant bear and I too end up gripping the edge of the bed and lying in the most awkward position. The hubby and the toddler sleep so soundly!! Snuggling with a sleeping toddler is dangerous ha ha

    • Elle May 11, 2011 at 11:22 #

      A 500 lb bear is the perfect description. 🙂

  2. Cheryl May 13, 2011 at 17:11 #

    OMG!!! I’m three months post-partum, and you had me crying and almost peeing with laughter! Our 5yo (almost 4′ weighing 46lbs) still wants to sleep with us in our queen sized bed all the time, but we only let him when he’s sick or for special movie nights once in a while. Between hubby nearly knocking our little guy out with his elbow and keeping me awake with his chainsaw snoring, and our little guy kicking me in the groin at the same time as headbutting me and putting me in a choke hold, it’s gotten to the point where if the little guy is sick, Daddy sleeps on the couch!

    • Elle May 14, 2011 at 18:29 #

      I think I’ll try that next time, just send my hubby to the couch. Or maybe I should just go there so I can get some sleep. 🙂

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