This will either scare you away or, well, scare you away.

I was up with insomnia last night and my thoughts turned to my blog. Here I share so much and open the door to my life, whether I’m going through ups or downs. I don’t like to sugarcoat things, like when I had that rough patch with my hubby which was made worse by the depression and anxiety I’ve been going through.

If you met me in real life you’d probably think there isn’t any way this person writes what I do since I’m painfully shy and quiet which can come off as me being stuck up and bitchy but I’m just extremely nervous in social situations.

I definitely have my bitchy moments and have perfected my “I’ll kill you in your sleep” look to my husband after he’s done something that pisses me off but in general I don’t think I’m a bitch but that’s probably what all of the true bitches say. ;^)

Obviously people who really know me see the real me, good and bad. That’s what I’ve been doing more and more on my blog; showing the real me.

I tend to overshare and give you way too much information about myself but it actually helps to just get it out in the blogosphere and I love when I find that others can relate.

When I started my site, I had no idea what I was doing but I had planned on making it mostly about the little hummingbird which ended up not happening as often. I didn’t realize how much I needed to get off of my chest.

While I don’t see my blog changing too drastically and there will still be my typical posts, there are things I would like to write about that I haven’t before, at least not in such a detailed way.

Basically I’ll be writing like how I talk to my mom, which is very upfront and I’m so glad that I have that rapport with her. Come to think of it, I’m already pretty upfront here but there will be topics every now and then that could be about something women might not really say much about, for instance What I didn’t expect after expecting.

It also means there might be times when your jaw could drop to the floor or you’ll be thinking to yourself I’ve experienced something similar and this makes me feel like less of a freak.

I really hope it will be the latter!

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7 Responses to This will either scare you away or, well, scare you away.

  1. dsfunctionalmom July 11, 2011 at 00:28 #

    I don’t think you’ll scare me away, if anything I’ll just realize we have a lot in common! My bitch side loves to rear her head.

  2. Ryan Ann July 11, 2011 at 01:35 #

    Definitely won’t scare me away. It’s funny, because I describe myself the same exact way: painfully shy. It sucks when people think you’re just a bitch when you are just (quietly) crazy stressing in your head in social situations. Been there more times than I’d like to count. :\ That is part of why I love your blog SO much, because I feel like I can relate on SO MANY levels. I feel less crazy knowing that I’m not alone. So thank you for that. And keep it up, whatever you can dish out, I’ll be here to read. 😀

  3. Suzi July 11, 2011 at 04:19 #

    Doubt I’ll be scared away! I also am shy until I get to know someone and can come off as stuck up. I look forward to your continued posts!

  4. Abby July 11, 2011 at 06:15 #

    Curious about this, because I am pretty much the same on my blog as I am in real life…but up until now I have been careful not to tell some stories because the people involved would be mortified to see it in writing. This I find weird because in real life, they are more than willing to share the laugh. Do you think you were “avoiding” topics generally to protect yourself? or others?

    • Elle July 11, 2011 at 07:54 #

      I definitely have avoided some things to protect myself even though I thought at the time it was to protect others. My hubby doesn’t read my blog unless I ask him to read something to get his feedback so my mom is the only person that reads it on a regular basis but she already knows everything.

      I’ve told very few people I know in real life that I have a blog just so I can write about anything I want. There have been a couple of times I’ve been hesitant to write something because I know my mom will read it although I’m not sure why I’ve gotten self concious because the way I write is the way my mom and I talk with each other. I think it could be because I don’t want to have her relive something over again, like when I talked about an abusive relationship I was in.

      I get embarrassed pretty easily and I think that’s what’s been holding me back when it comes to some things I write. But I’ve found when I say some of those things anyway, I actually feel better when I get it out there. 🙂

  5. Marianna Annadanna July 11, 2011 at 14:43 #

    It’s always the latter. Write whatever you want. Write for YOU. It’s the best writing.

  6. Sarah M July 12, 2011 at 18:38 #

    I Love LOVE reading your blog and it is because of the Latter we all end up feeling less alone together. After all the best person to bitch to is some who will totally agree with you, you don’t always need a devil’s advocate sometimes you need a co-bitcher HA HA

    Can’t wait for more because I have a blog that my whole family reads so this is where i can commiserate!! Although i am seriously considering starting a blog that no one know about!!

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