What was that you said? Oh! You want Jamie from Life Is Better With Me In It to give you parenting advice? Well, you’re in luck then. I asked Jamie
get it? if she would do a parenting advice column for my blog.
What makes her qualified, you ask? Jamie is the mom of 5 month old twins, Clive and Scarlet, works in accounting, and has a child and family studies degree.
She told me she has no idea what she’s doing with her own children, let alone what others should do and that’s when I knew she would be perfect. What really makes her qualified is she tried to learn the “Single Ladies” dance but she got a huge bruise and never finished learning it.
See! If you’re stuck when it comes to how to deal with your children then Jamie can at least partially teach you the Single Ladies dance which would make your kids freeze up and stare at their crazy mommy or if they’re older it would embarrass them so much that they run out of the room and leave you alone thus ending their undesirable behavior.
Hmmm, you definitely have something there with number one*…so since your advice was not readily available 14 years ago…please tell how to accomplish this with a teenager. Thanks!
*1. I’ve heard many parents say “Give your children plenty of praises” I say don’t. Instead, teach your children to praise you. You’re the one raising them, giving them free stuff. You deserve the most love.
You’ve asked the right person for this advice. A lot of child experts will tell you to take away things like, cell phones, ipods, computers, etc. and not give them back until the teenager behaves. I agree with this to an extent.
You should take those items away, but make sure to replace them with electronics from the 90s. Make your teenager carry around a huge 90s cell phone, a walk men (not for CDs the cassette ones), and work on an old computer with dial up speeds.
They’ll be so embarrassed they’re walking around looking lame and they’re beloved Facebook won’t load that they’ll never piss you off again.
I hadn’t even thought of having a parenting advice column until Jamie was a guest blogger. Her post went up on the 28th and the next day I sent her an email about the idea of an advice colum and then anxiously waited for a reply. When Jamie said yes I did a happy dance that looked more like a cat throwing up a hairball because this mama doesn’t have any rythmn.
I’m using “parenting advice” very loosely. It’s more like par~entertaining advice.
My lawyer and
sometimes late at night doctor, Mr. Google, told me I need to let you know that the parentertaining advice isn’t to be taken literally and is more for laughs than anything else. I’ve learned that some don’t always understand the language called funny or the language of my in-laws drive me crazy or I have a 2 year old that I love dearly but she’s making me crazy today. I’ve found by saying these things, they can piss people off. Obviously, these people will be missing out. ;^)
So, if you have a little one or an angsty tween/teen and are wondering what to do, Ask Jamie by emailing her at askjamiequestions at gmail dot com. or thisismommyhood at gmail dot com (I’m gradually changing my email address because I think it will be easier to remember but I’m still using my other one).
Depending on the response from readers, the parentertaining advice column will be either biweekly or once a month with a few questions answered in each column. You can also leave your questions in the comment section.