I swear I know how to take the birth control pill. There have been times when I’ve forgotten to take it and the next day I’ve doubled up. Not long ago I thought I might be pregnant so I did what anyone would do.
I took the question to Twitter and mentioned that while I feel like I might be, I’m on the pill so I can’t see it being possible. I was expecting people to say there’s no way I could be but that didn’t happen.
I heard from people, including a few dads, who had gotten pregnant while on the pill. Obviously, the dads I heard from weren’t the ones who were pregnant. I took a pregnancy test 2 days later and it was negative.
I thought it was for the best because not only am I dealing with depression, as much as I want another baby I can easily wait another year, maybe longer, to have a second baby although my years to have another one are dwindling quickly.
I got sick last month and then got that awful sinus infection that I’m still dealing with and waiting to get the approval from my insurance to get a CT scan so my ENT doctor, Dr. Cool, can see what’s going on.
I was also put on antibiotics and then a week later a second one. I completely forgot that when you’re on the pill you need to have back up birth control when taking antibiotics and I feel so effing stupid right now. I’ve taken 3 pregnancy tests. Two were positive and one was negative.
On one hand I really don’t think I’m pregnant but on the other hand it’s possible. Basically, I’m totally confused. When I was pregnant with the hummingbird I had what I thought was pms and I was cramping a lot but then I found that when it came to me at least, pregnancy symptoms can be similar to period symptoms.
I’ve never had a miscarriage that I know of but that’s something else I’m worried about. I had been bleeding for a day and a half over the weekend. I’m wondering if that could be why 2 tests were positive and one was negative.
The first test I took that was positive was at 11:30 last night and I was freaking out. I was thinking of how I’m taking an antidepressant, had been on pain meds for my insane sinus pain, and an anti-anxiety med and how they could cause harm. My husband was thrilled
not! when I woke him up an hour later freaking out and then telling him I might be pregnant.
I’m taking another test tomorrow morning and I’m thinking whatever it says, it will be best to go and see my asshole primary doctor so I can get a blood test to be sure either way.
I want another baby more than anything. It took me almost 14 years to have the hummingbird (that’s for another post). I can honestly say that if it’s positive or negative I’ll be happy either way.
I didn’t plan on actually making this a post but when my hubby came home tonight, I had just started having a panic attack and the best way I know how to deal with one is to take my mind off of it or write things down because I know it can help.
I also overshare because hell, I figure others have been in similar situations and I like to think I *might* help even a tiny bit if someone out there knows that someone else has gone or is going through the same thing.
So now I wait.
*Update. I’m going in for a blood test this morning but even with a rush on it, they said it can take up to 3 days so I might not find out until Monday. The 4th pg test I took earlier this morning was negative so now I’m even more confused. Quick, someone get me a brownie from the stress of not knowing. :^)