Freaky Deaky Shopping

The other day I went by myself to my favorite vacation destination, Target. I had to get a few things for some craft projects and while I was there, I decided to grab a bottle of vodka. It’s hard to survive a 3 year-old without it.

First, I found a big Tupperware container for one of my crafts. Then I made my way towards the baby clothes section for a looksy. Baby fever has been taking over my uterus lately but if it does happen, it will be awhile. I just jinxed myself, didn’t I? Shit!.

I went to the grocery section to get some flour and then grabbed a bottle of vodka.

I was amazed because I think this was the first time I didn’t grab anything extra. I didn’t go near the clearance rack, didn’t buy season 6 of Dexter even though that was a tough one to resist, and I spent way less money than I thought I would.

That never happens to me at Target. What the hell is going on with me?!

I was standing in the check out aisle putting things on the counter and started to realize just how freaky deaky I looked with the things in my shopping cart.

I had a bag of flour, 4 bottles of glue, a Tupperware container so big I can sit in it…probably, baby oil, and a bottle of vodka. Hmmmm.

As I was standing there looking at my purchases, I started to blush, thinking about what the cashier may be thinking I’m going to do with all of this stuff.

There were two people behind me who got a good look at what I was buying and I was ready for the floor to swallow me up. I was hoping the cashier would speed it up and at least get the baby oil and the bag of flour in the shopping bag but they sat there on display for a few minutes.

As I was standing there, I thought Blog Post! and started giggling…out loud. That doesn’t look crazy at all, right?

I finally got home and told my husband about my shopping trip. He didn’t find it embarrassing or amusing but that must be because his mind isn’t always in the gutter like mine is.

Do you have any memorable (embarrassing, irritating, funny) shopping trips?

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12 Responses to Freaky Deaky Shopping

  1. dysfunctional mom September 11, 2012 at 05:25 #

    I saw on Facebook where a cashier recently rang a woman up for just two purchases: The first 50 Shades of Grey book, and a cucumber………..
    dysfunctional mom recently posted..Turn it up Y’all!My Profile

  2. Tara September 11, 2012 at 06:27 #

    I went into CVS last night for Lindt truffles, a People magazine, and tampons. In my pajamas. Clearly everyone knew why I was there… 🙂
    Tara recently posted..The One Where I Try To Get OrganizedMy Profile

  3. RyanAnn September 11, 2012 at 06:54 #

    LOL! Love it! After I had my second daughter, I sent my hubby to Target to get me a breast pump. So him and his friend walked up to the check out with 3 things. A manual breast pump, a roll of duct tape and… wait for it… jumper cables. I laughed SO hard when his friend told me that my hubby told the cashier “The electric ones are too expensive. This ought to do the trick!” LMAO
    RyanAnn recently posted..HOE…My Profile

  4. Sam M September 11, 2012 at 07:24 #

    This reminds me of “The Walmart Game” we used to play in college. Everyone in the group takes turns trying to name the three most oddball items you could put together at checkout. For example: navy knee-high panty hose, motor oil, and plastic aquarium plants; or a watermelon scented candle, extra large adult diapers, and a 30lb bag of kitty litter. Needless to say, drinking was involved.

  5. Lily From It's A Dome Life September 11, 2012 at 09:12 #

    This is so funny. I love these shopping stories. I had to buy all of the ingredients to remove skunk spray from my dogs fur once. it looked like I was setting up some kind of chemical laboratory. I was all worried I might get on some list for buying gallons and gallons of hydrogen peroxide.
    Lily From It’s A Dome Life recently posted..Versatile Blogger Award (I Couldn’t Link You Enough, Seriously)My Profile

  6. The Girl September 11, 2012 at 11:58 #

    I once checked out at the grocery store with one bag of girls’ pull-ups (size XL), two bottles of wine, a roll of duct tape, and frozen pizza. I realized the hilarity of the purchase as the items were dragged across the scanner. Then, I got to my car, and realized I was wearing my slippers. I am sure the cashier thought I was mother of the year in my trailer park. (P.S. I don’t even have kids – the pull ups and duct tape were for my dog on her period, the wine was BOGO, and who doesn’t love frozen pizza?)

  7. Kim September 11, 2012 at 15:46 #

    Pictures, or it never happened!!! 😉
    Kim recently posted..Click, Click, Click! It’s Pap Smear Time…My Profile

  8. monica September 11, 2012 at 18:19 #

    omg. this is hysterical and the comments have made me snort. you sounded a little like you were making a bad batch of meth (not that i have any idea what that involves)…or something. i sent hubby to the the drug store a few months back for monostat – and that’s ALL. he came home with monostat (bless him), nicorette, and vaseline. what??? can you imagine what people were thinking??? yeesh. makes me shudder.
    monica recently posted..Netflix – I can’t quit you.My Profile

  9. Christene September 11, 2012 at 22:44 #

    Hey, the last time I went to a drugstore I came home with an Easter basket (it wasn’t Easter).
    Christene recently posted..40 Weeks of Pregnancy – Week 24My Profile

  10. Alyssa September 12, 2012 at 19:14 #

    The hubby hates getting condoms, because he always gets either the little old lady working past midnight at the local Walgreens, or the teenager. He’d rather buy tampons. And chocolate. And chips. Which I have made him do during “that time of the month” thing. Now that I live in the ‘hood, I’m waiting to have those interesting shopping experiences!
    Alyssa recently posted..A touch of serious todayMy Profile

  11. Becky B September 14, 2012 at 11:40 #

    It was Thanksgiving a couple years ago. My husband and I were heading to my parent’s house for dinner and we were in charge of bringing dessert. I had made pie at home and we were going to stop at the store and pick up some cool whip to go with it.

    While we were there I called my mom to see if she needed anything. She did. She needed pickles for her condiment tray.

    My husband decided while wandering around the store that vanilla ice cream would be better then cool whip.

    By the time we got to the checkout the only things we were buy were pickles and ice cream. I kid you not. The cashier kind of looked me up and down and I said No. I am not pregnant thankyouverymuch. 🙂

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  1. Cloud Dough Rocks And Is Worth The Mess If You Want To Get Anything Done….Like Going On Pinterest To Avoid The Laundry. | This Is Mommyhood - September 14, 2012

    […] little project is the main reason I did some freaky deaky shopping and got baby oil, flour, and the tupperware […]

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