Talking about the vagina.


This writing prompt comes from Mel: Maybe this has already been covered, but I’m currently struggling with it so I thought I’d mention it. My daughter is now two…what on earth am I supposed to call her lady bits? I cannot bring myself to say the word “vagina”, but all the suggestions I’ve gotten thus far have been even worse. “Tinkler”? Seriously? I’d have to gouge my eyes out every time she said it. GAH!

I was a huge Chelsea Handler fan years ago and heard her call a vagina a “pikachu”. I thought that was really cute so that’s what I decided to call my daughter’s vagina.

Since I still felt like I was 8, I was uncomfortable about calling it a vagina without getting the giggles or blushing if someone else was around.

We still call it her pikachu but I’m getting more comfortable with just calling it her vagina.

Which brings me to one of the dumbest things I’ve ever thought in my life. Well, with the exception of thinking how great some of my ex-boyfriends were when really they were douchebags.

My mom used to call my vagina a “tutu”. Ya know… the kind they wear dancing in ballet. I was into ballet when I was younger and would snicker whenever a tutu was mentioned. I would think how on earth is a ballet tutu also a name for a vagina?

Years went by and I didn’t ask why that was but it seemed like the strangest thing to me. How in the world could anyone keep a straight face when they said tutu because they were also talking about a vagina.

Then, when I was about 12, something about the ballet came up between my mom and I. That’s when I finally asked how in the world can they name a ballet tutu after a vagina.

My mom was like Elle, that was just a nickname I used for your vagina.

WHAT???

I’ve gotten it wrong all these years?!

I felt like the most GINORMOUS IDIOT in the whole world and still do. I spent the first 12 years of my life thinking a tutu was really another word for vagina.

D’oh!

Are there any goofs you’ve ever had with words? If you have a daughter, is their a nickname you use for her lady parts?

*Thanks, Mel! xx

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7 Responses to Talking about the vagina.

  1. Mammywoo November 12, 2012 at 11:39 #

    Mine was a flower!!

    I hate the word vagina, sounds So clinical.

  2. monica November 12, 2012 at 11:51 #

    i’ve always just used the words vagina and penis with my kids, but a really good friend of mine calls vaginas “twinkies.” i had NEVER heard that as a kid or an adult and i will never forget the time she and i were at the park shortly after i’d met her. she was rambling on and on with another mutual friend of ours about “twinkies.” i was half listening and half trying to keep my kids from killing each other. she nonchalantly asked me, “what do you think?” without even batting an eye i said, “i don’t let my kids eat twinkies.” she and our other friend burst out laughing. my then new found friend said, “well, i hope NOT!” it was hilarious then and they never have let me forget it – so, it’s STILL hilarious. great post. i cannot imagine calling the v-jay a tutu. that’s just crazy!
    monica recently posted..Happy Blogthday To Me.My Profile

  3. Emily Fowler November 12, 2012 at 13:12 #

    I’ve always used the actual terms for my son’s body parts (and for the girl parts, as he started asking about differences), mostly because I have a kid who is very literal and will call me on anything that isn’t “factual.”

    Anyway, funniest kid word miss use: When my sister and I were both preschoolers (I was prob 1.5 or 2, she was prob 4), my mom would say “I’m going to tickle your fancy” and pretend to come after us with tickling fingers…my sister and I would both laugh and try to cover our “fancies” so they couldn’t be tickled- I still don’t know why my sister would cover her tummy and I would cover my tush. (I like to think my toddler mind confused “Fancy” with “Fanny”, but I might just be weird)

  4. SM Johnson November 12, 2012 at 15:59 #

    We use the term “girl parts.” and we also refer to “boy parts” and that they are different from girl parts. She’s 9, and I recently asked her if she wants to know the real words, and she said “heck no!”
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  5. Vikki Claflin November 12, 2012 at 16:39 #

    Too funny! We called it a “po-po,” as in “going to powder my po-po” (which meant “take a shower.” Sheesh, we loved our euphemisms… :))
    Vikki Claflin recently posted..Next Time, I’ll Just Clean the OvenMy Profile

  6. WeezaFish November 13, 2012 at 02:40 #

    Ha ha! I have two boys, we’ve tried to use unisex words and by sheer luck, I hope they wont be confused when they’re older. ‘Winkie’ and ‘Private Parts’ is how we refer in our house, although having read the comments I have to admit to loving Monica’s word – ‘V-Jay’! :)

  7. rebecca c November 13, 2012 at 13:20 #

    I use the technical terms, penis and vagina, and have never regretted it. My almost 3 year old girl has trouble saying ‘vagina’ though so she calls it her ‘gina’ (ji-nuh). Sounds hilarious when she says it, like she nicknamed it just like guys and their weenies. Occasionally things get weird when she’s sorting out the genders of her classmates…”And Matthew has a penie and Lily has a gina!”

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