Me mind on fire…me soul on fire, feeling hot, hot, hot…with baby fever…. maybe?

The little hummingbird is 3 1/2 now and I’m having baby fever. My next door neighbor just had twins so my uterus is really starting to twinge with baby fever.

The problem is, I don’t think I want to have another baby. I absolutely LOVE the idea of having another baby but in reality, I love only having one child.

I think.

I was so frantic being a first time mom that it would be nice to do the baby thing over again and not be so freaked out about every little thing.

Plus, I think the hummingbird would love having a little brother or sister. She’s fascinated with babies right now and always points them out which gets me in baby fever mode but I just don’t know about having another.

Having just one is so hard in my opinion. How do you moms do it with more than one?

I’m also at that age where I really need to decide very soon whether or not I want to have another baby. Time is not on my side. I only have a few more years tops to figure this out.

I was at the nail salon recently and there was an older woman sitting next to me. We were talking about kids and she said that now that she’s older, she really wishes she had more than two children.

I want to have two kids tops but that woman got me thinking. Will I regret only having one child later in life? I can barely balance my career and the hummingbird as it is. How will I do it with two kids?

It’s crunch time and I’m clueless when it comes to whether or not I should have another child.

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12 Responses to Me mind on fire…me soul on fire, feeling hot, hot, hot…with baby fever…. maybe?

  1. Angie December 12, 2012 at 15:27 #

    It is always a tough decision on whether to have more children. I just had my second, and while it is hard, it isn’t as bad as I thought. I know there will be good days and bad days. I just hope the good days outnumber the bad days.

    Good luck with the decision!
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  2. Ericka C December 13, 2012 at 00:38 #

    Try 6 kids!! Bio, adopted, step & guardianship 🙂

  3. notmyyearoff December 13, 2012 at 08:01 #

    YES!!!! YES!!!! YESS!!!!!! I am soooo stuck too….I absolutely love spending all my time with Z, some days I want another but then some days I don’t and I worry that I won’t be able to handle 2 or I’ll regret it or I simply won’t know how to share my love between the two of them. This week I want another. Last week I didn’t. Hmmmmmmm….
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  4. monica December 13, 2012 at 12:49 #

    i have four and i love it. i wouldn’t trade it for the world. but i think each person has to decide what’s best for their family. my friends with one love it, too! give it some serious thought and go with your gut. don’t regret your choice!
    monica recently posted..Is Christmas early this year? Or, is it just me?My Profile

  5. SM Johnson December 13, 2012 at 16:35 #

    My only child is 9. I have tons of freedom now and can afford both the time and money for the activities she wants to pursue. Sometimes she wishes she wasn’t an “only lonely” but I have no regrets whatsoever.
    SM Johnson recently posted..SM Johnson ~Thursday Morning Coffee ~ New Story ExcerptMy Profile

  6. LeeAnne Curtis December 13, 2012 at 17:46 #

    Elle – as you know, I only have the 1 (i would try anything once!!!). Now at my ripe ole age of 60+++++++ I have second guessed my thoughts on having another one. WELL – I’ll be dern – didn’t have one and I SURE don’t miss it. I got a dog that loved me unconditionally as long as she was fed, walked occassionally and allowed to chew on my hubs ankles without getting into too much trouble. That worked for ME- But I have to agree with SM Johnson and I also have to agree with Monica as My Daughter in Love and Stepson have 4 children and SHE does a wonderful job of taking care of them, as well as being a Preachers Wife, Daughter, Sister, Granddaughter, etc. So – to each her own and just know that whatever you decide, it’s your decision and be comfortable with that!!!
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  7. Tracey L Croisier December 17, 2012 at 16:45 #

    Just found your blog, so I don’t know how old you are. But “crunch time” — in terms of age? I had twins at age 44. It can be done. I believe the egg happiness falls off a cliff at about age 41.5 … so if you are 41.25, then, yes!, go for it. I’d love another go at motherhood and envy you young ‘uns that can have that as an option.
    Tracey L Croisier recently posted..Just 4 FunMy Profile

  8. Cara December 18, 2012 at 11:27 #

    I just happened to link to your site from the Bloggess, and holy crap, this was like reading my own thoughts on paper. Our first is only nine months old, but I don’t necessarily have much time, and I have a bad ovary. And I lov emy job. and I’m terrible at the stay-at-home mom thing, which might be required with two. What to do?!? So hard!!

  9. michelej December 19, 2012 at 11:05 #

    When my son was tiny, I remember thinking, how do people ever have more than one child? It’s madness! I’d never be able to handle it!

    We did try for a second, and ended up with twins (my son had just turned 2 when they were born). Other twin moms told me, It’s going to be a blur – make your peace with it. They were right… Some days, if all I did was keep everyone fed and in dry diapers, I deemed the day a success.

    I know, I set the bar pretty low.

    They’re 6 and 8 now, and even with all the chaos, I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

    But I’m a firm believer in the idea that everyone gets to choose what’s best for their family… If you end up sticking with one, don’t let people make you feel bad about it! Your family is complete when you decide it is – trust yourself.

  10. Ien in the Kootenays December 20, 2012 at 17:47 #

    I had my 2 almost 5 years apart. I really enjoyed the year my oldest was the age your child is now. I needed that break from intensive care giving. To my surprise I found the adjustment from one to two harder than the adjustment from none to 1. With one, you are a couple with a child. With two, there is as many of them as of you.

    There are pros and cons to any choices we make, and all important decisions have to be made on the basis of insufficient data. Sometimes I think life was simpler when there were fewer choices. We just played the cards we were handed as well as we could, instead of agonizing over which cards to pick. Whatever you decide will be both right and wrong.

    Just one thing: decide what is best for YOU, not because society tells you two is better.

  11. tangomum December 26, 2012 at 12:52 #

    I thought I’d never have children, and now I have a toddler: a miraculous hummingbird of my own. I won’t ask for two miracles. I’m giving all my emotional and psychological strength for this one. Perhaps if I were younger (42!) or more prosperous, or less prone to depression… The whatifs might haunt me, but here and now I choose to enjoy this tiny human. It’s right for me. What you do will be right for you.

  12. F. February 10, 2013 at 17:38 #

    I have a 3 yr old and a 5 mo old. I say this only so that you understand I am biased.

    Before I had my son, I didn’t know how people with 1 child could manage. Then I had him, and I managed. Before having my second one, I couldn’t imagine life with two, but now I manage that too.

    There’s just somehow always a way.

    There are benefits both ways: a single child gets 100% of their parental attention and financial support. If you have a sibling, you have a playmate and life-long friend who understands exactly where you came from.

    There is no perfect answer, just one that is right for you.

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