On Thursday, the little hummingbird is going to be admitted to the Stanford Children’s Hospital. Some of you may know that since she was born, she’s has occasional problems with low blood sugar. For awhile, we thought it went away on it’s own. Then last March, we all got really sick with the flu and her blood sugar crashed. We rushed to the emergency room and she stayed in the hospital a week.
Then a few months ago, the same thing happened but this time we weren’t even sick. This hypoglycemia isn’t a regular thing and doesn’t happen often but when it does, it comes on hard.
As a last resort, her doctor suggested the hummingbird be hospitalized and putting her on an 18 hour fast. So, she wants the bird to have her blood sugar crash so they can get the blood work they need to tell them why her blood sugar isn’t being stored properly.
That option was given to us not quite a year ago. After other blood work, a trip to a gastrointestinal doctor, and DNA testing for the hubby and I, they couldn’t find what was causing the blood sugar drop.
We are now at our last resort and I’m freaking the fuck out. She has a very good doctor at Stanford but having her go through this is triggering all sorts of panic and anxiety. Especially when still dealing with postpartum ptsd.
I can’t stand to be in a hospital and having to see her hooked up to an I.V. and monitors. I really fucking panic.
But this is the last option left to see if the doctors can figure out what is causing sporadic drops in her blood sugar.
I’m really in such a panic and trying so hard to distract myself. It doesn’t hurt that I just got a refill on my xanax.
If it goes as planned, we leave for Stanford early Thursday morning and will hopefully be released later that night where we’ll stay at a hotel near the hospital “just in case”.
Of course with my mind the way it is, all I can think about is the things that might go wrong. I have this horrible fear that they won’t be able to stabilize her blood sugar after the fast and she’ll be stuck in the hospital longer than expected.
Despite that, I’m just trying to think that by Thursday night, we’ll be kicking back in our hotel room with the hummingbird who will be fine and fluttering about.
I really hope that’s what happens. Until then, I am filled with so much panic and anxiety that it’s hard to think straight.