I’ve never liked my hair. It’s fine but thick and naturally curly, yet straight in some places. It’s a pain in the ass to do anything with. When I let it dry naturally, I look like the Bride of Frankenstein. When I use a blow dryer, it looks even worse and I feel like I have the most awful hair in the world.
My hair usually ends up frizzy and looks like cotton candy. I’ll either throw it in a ponytail or just give up and sob quietly while I eat a gallon of ice cream and watch the Lifetime Movie Network.
Since I was a little girl, I’ve had hair envy. I see women with long, thick, straight hair and I want that to be me. Look at Kate Beckinsale. Her hair is gorgeous.
Although, I’m sure she has a hair stylist at her beck and call who uses exotic treatments on her hair – like the oil derived from the skin of baby seals that can only be obtained once a year and costs thousands of dollars for a 1 ounce bottle.
The times when I’ve actually gotten compliments on my hair, I usually want to respond with “Thank you but just how much crack have you been smoking lately?”
As with everything else, the grass is always greener. If you have straight hair, you want to go curly. If you have curly hair, you want straight hair.
I have tried a countless amount of curling irons, straightening irons, hair extensions, shampoo and hair products, hoping one day I’ll get in that shower, wash my hair, dry it, and TA-DA… I’ll be “perfect hair woman”.
I’m always telling myself, maybe, just maybe my hair will magically become perfect and effortless.
Nope, it’s never going to happen.
Every morning, I stretch and bend my arms all over the place while I use a flat-iron. My arms get tired, I get hot, and the hair that I’ve already straightened will start to frizz. Fuuuck!
I discovered the Brazilian Blowout treatment a few years ago.
I have a great hairdresser who gives me a Brazilian Blowout every 3-4 months. It makes a HUGE difference and my hair’s more manageable but it can still be a pain.
Plus, I drop a few hundred dollars to do it. Eeek! Ssshh, don’t tell my husband how much it costs.
I know I’ll never be perfect hair woman but… damn it, it’s still not going to stop me from buying a 20 dollar bottle of anti-frizz serum from the salon.
Maybe, just maybe that will be what my hair needs.
And once I buy that magical hair serum or shampoo or deep conditioning treatment, I’m going to ride off into the sunset on my unicorn.