Rumor Has It

It was brought to my attention a while ago when it came to rumors about my blog (so weird) and what I post. I thought now would be a good time to clear some things up for those people.

What is up with “Elle”?

When I started this blog, I was absolutely, positively going to remain anonymous. Ha! The biggest issue was because my husband is in the military and was teaching at the time. He had concerns that his students would come across my writing. That’s why I started writing under “Elle”. But then I was getting more writing opportunities, which I honestly wasn’t expecting, and ended up sticking with writing under a pseudonym.

To be honest, after being sent some of these rumors and reading them, I’m very glad I keep it that way.

I “came out” to friends and family I know in real life and that’s why I’m more open about it on my private Facebook.

I also see the same posts on other sites.

Yes, yes you do. And? If you look on posts written at the bottom of one of those sites, it even states that I originally posted the content on This Is Mommyhood.

You try way too hard to be funny and you’re just not. You end up looking like an idiot.

Awww, thanks.

But you lost a child back in March and you just don’t seem to be grieving about it on your blog like I think you should. What’s up with that?

Oh my god, I am so, so sorry about that! How could I do such a thing to you?

I had many reasons to start this blog 4 years ago. What I love so much about it is that in reality I am so painfully shy and very quiet to those I don’t really know. But when I write, my real personality comes out. I can be way too open and I know that. When I lost Ben, I was certain I would write plenty about the horrible pain and heartbreak I have over losing my son.

And I have written about him. I just haven’t published it. It’s very hard for me to talk about it, even to my own mother. Writing about ANYTHING else is what I’ve needed. I couldn’t even tell you how emotionally and physically upset I get every single day. Well I could, but who really wants to hear that day after day.

A classmate of the little hummingbird has a brother that is close to what Ben’s age would be. Whenever I see him, my stomach drops. I’ll get a lump in my throat and my heart feels like it’s going to pound out of my chest. Then the tears start and I have to keep it together until I get my daughter and myself into the car.

As much as I share (and I share a lot), there are plenty of things I don’t. There are moments I just want to keep for myself. Especially when it comes to my daughter and baby boy.

If you’re a parent, you already know how many times your child turns you into a puddle of emotions each day and the love you feel is beyond anything else.

I could write about all of that sugary stuff, but I rather write about the every day things that can drive me crazy or make me laugh when it comes to being a wife and mother. It’s my release.

I don’t think you were really pregnant.

Ummm, okay.

I’m FB friends with you and I’m contributing to these rumors.

You’re so kind. Looks like I need to filter out some people.

You’re still not funny and what it the deal with you talking about your vagina?

Well, you’re in luck. My vagina is doing pretty dandy these days but if you aren’t happy with what I write, there are countless other sites that you can read instead.


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12 Responses to Rumor Has It

  1. Charlie August 7, 2014 at 00:14 #

    Love it! Well said!

    • Elle August 7, 2014 at 13:08 #

      Thanks, Charlie. 🙂

  2. Shauna August 7, 2014 at 11:33 #

    I think you’re great! Who needs those people?!!

    • Elle August 7, 2014 at 16:37 #

      Thank you, Shauna. xo

  3. Lisa August 7, 2014 at 12:12 #

    I cannot BELIEVE some of the VICIOUS things you posted about what people have said. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I’m so floored I don’t know what else to say.

    For what is’ worth, I love your blog, I think you’re funny as all hell. I have no doubt you were pregnant and lost your sweet Ben. Dump those Facebook “friends” of yours. I am, however, still on the fence about your vajayjay, lol.


    • Elle August 7, 2014 at 16:49 #

      Lol, thanks Lisa!

      I was going to keep quiet but was ticked to find out a few friends I’ve known since junior high were saying things as well.

      After venting and bitching, I’m feeling better. 😉 xo

  4. My Special Kind of Crazy August 7, 2014 at 14:29 #

    I’m sort of stunned….people start “rumors” about blogs? Is there some sort of secret chat page for this kind of thing? Who knew.
    But really, to the people that think you should write more about losing your boy…that is just…trying to find the word here….absurd. No, that’s not it…atrocious? No…despicable? Maybe a bit closer…but whatever the word, it’s not a good one. I remember you posting about Ben having Downs and I remember thinking oh my gosh oh no…and then when you lost Ben I thought…really life? Not Fair! And when you DIDN’T write all about it (and given that I know all that, and I am only an internet “friend” you obviously DID write about it, but I guess they wanted all the heartwrenching feelings) I thought…good for her. She’s doing what she needs for her. How people can criticize that I don’t know…
    My Special Kind of Crazy recently posted..All About The Celebrating!My Profile

    • Elle August 7, 2014 at 16:43 #

      Someone pointed me in this direction…. It’s like a celebrity gossip site but about (mostly) women bloggers. Wha?? So strange. I would’ve never thought something like that existed.

      The rumors are mostly elsewhere but I can’t believe long-time friends have been adding to it. I wasn’t going to make a big deal about it but when I saw that people were discussing if my pregnancy was fake, that pissed me off.

      I’m cooled off now though. 😀 xo
      Elle recently posted..Rumor Has ItMy Profile

  5. LeeAnne Curtis August 8, 2014 at 21:35 #

    Some people, who don’t have a life, would much rather “spread” a little gossip by turning a molehole into a mountain! Having been on the receiving end of “did you hear about _____________________________________________(add whatever here), so I can actually say I know how you feel. But, as with all things, this too shall pass. I am so sorry that people can be absolute a$$holes, and you can’t fix stupid.
    LeeAnne Curtis recently posted..Mirror Name Christmas Bibs, Terry Cloth by LeeannesCreationsMy Profile

  6. Rachel CrazyMum August 9, 2014 at 09:38 #

    I am so sorry you have these awful people to deal with, especially the ones who criticise the way you are grieving. How dare they say that to you? Grief is an intensely personal experience, no two people grieve the same way, how can they possibly spew such vitriol to a bereaved mother is beyond my comprehension. I don’t know if this will be helpful to you, but there is a doctor called Joanne Cacciatore, who specializes in grief and bereavement, especially for the loss of children. She KNOWS what it is like, as she lost a baby to still birth. Here is here Facebook page if you are interested:

    With best wishes xxx

  7. Naomi August 10, 2014 at 18:39 #

    I love your posts and wouldn’t read them if I didn’t want to. I don’t understand people who do otherwise. Rumors are just silly. Who has time for that? Making rumors about someone else’s tragedies is just nasty. At least you found out about it.

  8. Amy O August 27, 2014 at 00:59 #

    OMG. People are assholes!

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