#Blessed

Something has been on my mind for quite a while that I just have to get out in the open.

No, it’s not that Trump is a disgusting, vile pig who needs to be grabbed by the pussy because he’s a chicken shit and coward for not attending the White House Correspondent’s Dinner, although yes, that was something I’ve been thinking about. No offense to chicken shit or pussies.

What I want to get out in the open is that I can’t take one more person being “#blessed” on their Facebook status.

Don’t get me wrong. If you feel that way, great for you.

It’s the insane overuse of the word that annoys me. An example of the use, which I’m totally pulling out of my ass…

Facebook Status:

‘I bought a frozen lemonade at Panera and it was delicious. #lemonade #blessed’

2k likes

55 comments

Really?

It’s a fucking lemonade. Chill the fuck out.

And, seriously. You have that many likes?

I share a video of a cat eating watermelon in a funny hat while dressed up as Princess Leia with a functioning light saber, but it only gets 2 likes.

What is up with that?!

Ahem, anyway… I get the use of the word with the birth of a child or somebody recovering from surgery, etc. But, to use it all the fucking time? What happened to words like ‘thankful’ or ‘happy’?

Nope, it’s not good enough, apparently.

Facebook Status:

‘I’m so #blessed that there was a hidden tampon in my purse when I thought I was out.’

Okay, actually finding a tampon that I didn’t think I had when I’m bleeding to death at that time of the month is a blessing because I don’t want to put pants on, drive to the store, walk, get stuck behind the slowest fucking person in the whole goddamn universe, walk back to my car, and drive home. I don’t want to deal with people when I’m on my period.

Oops, my mistake.

The desire to not have to deal with people is something I want on a daily basis.

So, can you tell by my bitchiness that I’m currently on my period, would kill for a Snickers bar, and found a surprise and unopened box of tampons in a bathroom cabinet earlier?

#blessed

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7 Responses to #Blessed

  1. Tanya February 27, 2017 at 16:00 #

    HA!!! Amazing post and I am right there with you. If there is anythjng to feel #blessed about, it is a tampon when you have blood pouring out of your vagina. LEMONADE? 2k likes? Has everyone gone mad?? Who gives a fuck about lemonade? *shaking my head*
    Tanya recently posted..thanks, for squeezing my lemonsMy Profile

  2. WeezaFish February 27, 2017 at 18:00 #

    Ah that’s funny. Sorry, you’re tense and I’m laughing 🙂 Must have been one hell of a lemonade. Get your Snicker’s yet? xx

  3. Melissa H February 28, 2017 at 11:49 #

    Absolutely on board with the overuse of the word. I work for an agency that deals with people at their lowest financial point. Many of them have completely crapped up their lives with bad choices, i.e., kids taken away, homeless, destitute. …and yet, when I ask “How are you?”…of course, they’re “blessed.” Finding tampons in a bloody, wretched moment is indeed a blessing. Living on the streets without your children = NOT #blessed.

  4. Notmyyearoff March 5, 2017 at 14:22 #

    This post really made me chuckle. There is someone I know that posts this every…single…day and I want to throw stuff sometimes at my screen. You just know they really want to sometimes post “wantToPunchHimInTheFace” or something similar.
    Notmyyearoff recently posted..Couple timeMy Profile

  5. Carrie March 23, 2017 at 10:09 #

    Very true and funny..Just found your blog and i love your humor..need it nowadays with all the craziness going on. I just wanted to add I no longer have periods and feel “blessed”…

  6. The Informal Matriarch March 24, 2017 at 14:42 #

    No truer words have been spoken. It’s like the gods specifically do random shit for them, like make sure the CEO of Panera approves lemonade on the menu JUST FOR THEM!

  7. Pretty Much April 24, 2017 at 23:00 #

    Omg you’re hysterical. I’m so #blessed to have discovered you 😉 really though. Thanks for writing awesome shit!

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