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Throwback Thursday: My Beautiful Mom And Snazzy Grandfather

When it comes to me and having my photo taken, it’s not a good mix by any means. Even when I was a cute kid, I HATED having my photo taken. Even now, I edit my pics if I share with someone. My aunt was the same way.

Pretty much every photo I have of her has her avoiding the camera or turning her face so you couldn’t see her. Haha! It must run in the family.

Anyway, for the past 15 years or so, I’ve been telling my husband that I want to organize our big ass box of pictures and put them into photo albums. Someday, I really want to pass them on to the hummingbird.

As I was looking through the photos, I found a photo of my beautiful mother and my very snazzy maternal grandfather. He was the coolest grandfather ever, the best.

He passed away when I was only 15 and I think about him every single day. We spent the day together one day during the summer and his last words to me were “See you soon! Two months later, he left this earth.

But, I have my beloved photos of him and will forever keep him in my memory and think of him always. He had a tattoo on his arm that he got while in the military that I thought was so cool. He fought in World War 2, was part of the Flying Tigers, and was a police officer.

My family didn’t have cable but he would put a video in his VCR (fuck, I feel old), and record hours of MTV for me, back when they actually played music videos.

He would do those little things for me that I greatly appreciated. I love him dearly.

The little hummingbird has been told plenty about how wonderful her great-grandfather was. I hope she learns more about him as the years go by and see just how special he was.

My incredible grandfather.

My incredible grandfather.


My beautiful mother.

My beautiful mother.

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Our little strawberry picker.



*Soul One

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Our first Spring in Maine.

Springtime. The sun is shining. The weather’s nice. Flowers are blooming. There are baby animals everywhere. Motherfucking birds are chirping their little asses off. Black flies are out to get me. Ants are on a mission to take over my entire kitchen. It starts getting hotter and boob sweat is prevalent.

Ah, Springtime.

It’s actually one of my fave seasons and after our first winter in Maine, I’m welcoming it with open arms. Before I know it, Summer will be here and I’m not a fan. So, I’m enjoying my pre-Summer time.

I hope you’re enjoying it too.


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I’ll pass on the carrots.

*This is really gross.

As long as I’ve been with my husband, 19 years, he always has a big bowl of baby carrots whenever we have pizza.

Fine, no biggie, right?


It’s one of those teeny tiny relationship things that doesn’t seem like a big deal but drives me up the wall after all of these years. Crunch, crunch, crunch is what I hear for what feels like forever.

While we were having pizza the other night, the hummingbird was chewing a carrot and started gagging. The closest thing to me was the big bowl of carrots, filled to the brim.

Gross Alert… she puked in the carrot bowl.

After she finished, my first thought was YES, there go the carrots!!

Yay, I didn’t have to hear that carrot crunch for once!

Thank you, my pukey 4 year-old. Thank you.

*Somewhat Damaged

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I was going to try to keep this on the down low but I’m so excited as well as very nervous and anxious. It’s difficult to keep this quiet for the next few months since I love to overshare… for better or worse.

If all goes well this time around, the hummingbird is going to be a big sister. Fingers and toes crossed! 

We were planning on waiting to try again early next year but my birth control pill had another fail. Whoops! I was taking it every day at the same time every night. Didn’t miss once… that I know of.

For the people I know in real life who read my blog, I would greatly appreciate it if you could keep this quiet for now. Mwah!

But I wanted to share this news with all of you who have been such wonderful support since the loss I had in July and beyond. I sincerely mean it and thank you all. You’ve all been so kind and absolute sweethearts.

Love ya! xoxo

My collection since I'm still in disbelief. lol

My collection since I’m still in disbelief. lol

*Love Song

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Insane In The Maine Brain: Pics

Now that I’m getting more settled here, I’m starting to see how gorgeous it is. One thing that amazes my husband and I is that the sky is incredible in Maine. Most days, it looks like the clouds have been photoshopped.

I know, it’s just some clouds but I find it to be pretty damn spectacular. And the sunsets are like no other.







*Silversun Pickups

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My mind will always be boggled by the fact that I made a person.

bird-diner1*Real Quick… I’ve been using the nickname hummingbird for my daughter and of course the hubby for who else? My hubby. I’ll still call them that but I’d like to use regular names for them from time to time. Because of my anonymity, needless to say, I can’t do that. So, you get to pick the name I’ll use for them in future posts.

For the “fake name” choices, they are Poppy and Ava for the hummingbird. For the husband, it’s Ryan (for Ryan Gosling, of course) or Eric. Vote in the comments!


Fine. This is getting away from my regular bitching and snark and may be too sickly sweet for some people. If that happens, drink a shot of tequila every time you see the word “love”, even if you’re at work. I counted 9, by the way, including “lub”. But I could be wrong as math was and will always be my worst subject.

Here are some of the things that the hummingbird currently does that pull on my heartstrings.

1. I love how she doesn’t quite know how to say her F’s yet. She’ll say “my pinger” or “are you making pood?” Or when she asks me “mommy, why did you just say “pucker?” while I’m driving.

2. How she gets so excited by the smallest things. I bought her a few pairs of sunglasses at Gymboree last month and as we were walking back to the car, she told EVERYBODY she passed that “mommy bought me sunglasses!”

3. I love that I can easily make her laugh.

4. I love how when I call her a stinker, she says “I’m not a stinker, I’m hummingbird”. Subs with her real name, of course.

5. As many mommy fuck-ups I feel like I have, she has so much patience and love for me.

6. She says “I lub you!”

7. I love how she picks her outfits out by herself and love seeing what she comes up with.

8. She seems to look at the world with so much joy and hope. It helps me to look past the bad.

9. How she greets me when I pick her up at preschool.

10. I love how silly she is and her sense of humor.

11. I love that I helped create this incredible and beautiful person and still can’t believe that she came from my body. Am I the only one that still thinks that’s so weird? That you actually create a person. Even after 4 years, it’s still is something that’s hard for me to believe. My mind will always be boggled by that.

I think it’s so important to take a look at the things we love about our children because in everyday life, it’s so easy to get caught up in bullshit and we forget to see the wonderful side of our little hummingbirds.

What’s the first thing that comes to mind that makes you crazy in love with your children?

*Dixie Chicks

Now to clear your palate. From The King’s Speech. Love!



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