The little hummingbird started gymnastics a few months ago ago and during her very first class, there was a mom there that I found mildly annoying.
The classes are held in a small gym and there’s a waiting area with a few row of seats for the parents, and a step that goes up into the gymnastics area.
Type A mom sits front and center to watch her girls in the class and has a 2 year-old that she brings with her to the hour-long class that she for some reason expects to sit quietly during the entire time. I can barely sit still and be quiet the whole hour so her 2 year-old does a better job than I do.
For the first several classes, I tried to give Type A mom the benefit of the doubt and figured she was having an off day. But after spending about a dozen hours with her, I’ve found that she’s not so much a Type A mom as she is Kate Gosselin 2.0.
There are 2 young instructors teaching the gymnastics class along with the owner who I’ll call Chanandler Bong.
Despite the kids in the class being given instruction, Katie G just does not shut the fuck up. Ever. During the second class, she was riding her oldest daughter really hard. Her kid was on the parallel bars and Kate was yelling at her to keep her legs straight and DO BETTER!
At the end of the class, I come to find out that’s not even her kid. Oh, really Kate Gosselin 2.0. Really?
The hour-long class with her bullshit is mentally exhausting. She’s always yelling at her kids, including her 2 year-old, by their first and middle name and she even threatens to make them sit in the car.
It goes something like this…
Rachel! RACHEL GREEN! Sit down and watch your sisters! DO NOT get out of this chair again!
Phoebe! Phoebe! PHOEBE BUFFAY!! KEEP THOSE LEGS STRAIGHT! Phoebe?! Listen to me! If you don’t listen, I’m putting you IN THE CAR!
Rachel! RACHEL! Get off the step and SIT DOWN. Rachel, OFF THE STEP. Mr. Chanandler Bong doesn’t want you on the step. I will put you in the car until the class is over!
<Phoebe runs up and asks for some water> NO, you can’t have any. You need to practice your flips — AND KEEP THOSE LEGS STRAIGHT!
MONICA GELLER! Do that round off again! I want to see you DO BETTER! Monica! Monica! DO BETTER! KEEP THOSE LEGS STRAIGHT!
PHOEBE! YOU WILL GO SIT IN THE CAR THIS MINUTE IF YOU DON’T START LISTENING TO MR. CHANANDLER BONG!
This plays out for most of the class.
I roll my eyes so much, I may need to start taking motion sickness pills before each class.
I usually sit there, looking at her like I would Bigfoot –with What The Fuck curiosity and wishing I had a tranquilizer gun.
By the end of the class, she’s hemming and hawing about how difficult her kids are and how tiring this class is for her. Really, Kate, REALLY??!
I know from the rumblings in the class that other parents are also appalled by her behavior but I don’t think anyone really knows what to do about it.
Many times, I’ve been tempted to walk up to her and say “Excuse me, YOU go sit IN THE CAR!” Oh, how I wish I had the balls to do that.
Previously, I couldn’t understand when I would hear in the news about parents that get into shouting matches or even fist fights while at their kids extra-curricular activities but seeing the way Katie G is, now it makes a little more sense. If there were 2 of her in this class, I’m sure fists would fly from the competitiveness of the parents, not the kids.
On the up side, the little hummingbird is so fearless and rocks the class. She has such a natural athletic ability. I have a feeling this won’t be the last time I come across a parent like Katie G since the bird is looking forward to participating in other programs, like soccer.
Thankfully, this gymnastics class is almost over and I guarantee when I enroll the hummingbird in the next session, I will triple check to make sure that we don’t get in the same class that Kate “KEEP YOUR LEGS STRAIGHT AND DO BETTER!” Gosselin 2.0 will be in.
Have you ever spoken up to a parent over their behavior?