I was such a doofus when I was pregnant and thought that if women have a vaginal birth, then they have the rest of their years to pee themselves whenever laughing, sneezing, and breathing. Then I had an emergency c-section and found that despite that, my bladder control is a lot to be desired.

This morning:

The hummingbird (age 3): Mommy, what’s this?

Me: That’s a pad.

Hummingbird: Why?  I want to wear it.

Me: Because mommy pees herself sometimes.

Hummingbird: Can I put one on?

Me: No sweetie, you don’t need that for a while.

Hummingbird: Why do you have them?

Me: I already told you, mommy pees herself sometimes.

Hummingbird: Why?

Me: Because a few years ago you were in mommy’s belly and after mommy had you, my vagina got large.

Hummingbird: Your bagina got large?

Me: Yep.