I used to be a vegetarian and I was a vegan for a short time. I don’t find myself eating as much meat now since the little hummingbird doesn’t like it. Sometimes though you just need In N’ Out or 5 guys. That totally sounds like a porno or is that just me?

If you haven’t checked out my new blog then it’s The Good Food Diaries. The plan was and still is to write about healthier living but I’ve been thinking of having it be more of a challenge to get from microwave queen to an actual cook. Or I’m just thinking crazy thoughts because of the fumes from the oven cleaning spray. That is if I actually cleaned my oven just now.

Anyway, this cake is eggless and it’s so much better than the box cakes. Trust me, I never thought I’d say that. A crispy layer forms on the top of the cake and it is oh so good!

INGREDIENTS:
2 cups turbinado sugar
3 cups all purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
2 cups water
1 cup canola oil
2 Tablespoons distilled white vinegar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

DIRECTIONS:

Preheat oven to 350.

In a large bowl mix dry ingredients

Add wet ingredients. Beat by hand until smooth. Have your little hummingbird stir and sneak a taste.

Pour into 9×13 pan. Bake for about 40 minutes

Voila!

~~~~~

I made the mistake of adding the pecans and then spreading it on the cake. Oops, it wasn’t a pretty sight. Add the chopped pecans on top of the cake after it has been frosted.

* I’ve tried to accurately change ingredients for the cake but if you see that I overlooked something, please leave the proper food choice correction for Vegans in the comment section. Thanks!

This guest post is from the always lovely Weezafish who I’m very honored to have as a new writer for A Nervous Tic Motion.

A few of her posts that are must reads are Big Shout Out To All The Mummys…Now Go Easy On Yourselves, COP 17 – Get Ready for That Ice Age People, and I Wanna Girl.

Q and A with Weeza

Weezafish: E. other and what would it be? I’m definitely favouring a big ol’ shot gun for easy head removal from a distance. I don’t want Zombie blood and brain matter all over my nice outfit, I plan on looking hot while I blast those undead!

Elle: If you could be stuck in an elevator with anyone who would it be? 

Weeza: I hate to sound boring but honestly, Hubby would be my first choice. He’s a very resourceful, knowledgeable and hands on sort of a chap, so I feel fairly confident that he’d figure a way out. Failing that, I love his conversation and I fancy the pants off him so if we get bored waiting for help we’re all good

Elle: If you could drop everything and go anywhere in the world (real or fantasy), where would it be?

Weeza: I’m going to forget for a second that all my family are in the UK because that’s the obvious choice, as I’m living in Africa. But aside from that, I’d love to travel to the Far East. I love travelling full stop but the Far East is a place I haven’t got to yet and I’d love to go. Malaysia, Thailand .. interesting destinations to me.

Elle: Favorite guilty pleasure?

Weeza: I do love my chocolate, but as do most sensible and intelligent people in my eyes and I wouldn’t exactly say I feel guilty about my love of it, ha! Smoking, I guess, is the one I would feel guilty about although it’s not a great secret that I smoke. The guilt comes from knowing that in just doing so, I’m giving my kids the totally wrong role model for health, ‘real’ though it may be.

Elle: If you could send any celebrity/reality star into space so you’d never have to hear about them again, who would it be?

Weeza: Celine Dion. You need me to explain?? Elle: That awful Titanic song that she sings kills my soul every time I hear it so there’s no need to explain.

Elle: Which would you rather win? An Oscar, a Grammy, or a Tony.

Weeza: Grammy. Music is my first love.

Elle: What’s one of your favorite books?

Weezafish: The Talisman by Stephen King and Peter Strauss. A very moving and sometimes horrific, fantasy filled adventure that I first read when I was 11 or 12. The impact of it’s writing and how it moved me has never left me and it’s topped my book list ever since. I read a lot, I love a good book, but nothing has ever outshone the memories of that early read of mine.

Elle: What song(s) makes you want to dance around your house and/or brings you back to your teen years?

Weezafish: ANYTHING disco and/or funky will get me moving. Jamiroquai reminds me of the 90′s and I was an Ibiza loving House Bunny (believe it or not) in my youth so any well mixed Deep House from Ibiza clubs is always a winner at my party.

Elle: A favorite non-mommy activity?

Weeza: If I’m non-Mummy, then firstly I try and focus on Hubby and I’s time together. You don’t mean rude stuff though do you? But if it’s something just for me, it will probably be writing led. Either blogging, or reading. With a large slab of choc to hand.

Elle: What’s a favorite book that you like to read to your kids?

Weeza: Age group they are now, I love reading them the Mr Men books. I had them as a child and my Mum bought a couple for the boys when she last visited. When they’re older, I’m looking forward to reading them Trillions by Nicholas Fisk, one of my childhood favourites, as well as the more obvious ‘greats’ like Harry Potter, Tolkein.

Elle: What kids cartoon or character makes you want to bang your head against a spike?

Weezafish: None that I can think of! Like most Mum’s, I try and steer clear of the fighting led ones but I’m a big fan of Pixar movies so maybe I’m too immature to answer that question!

Elle: What’s one of your favorite movies?

Weeza: Ah too many, too many. I love a good movie. Little Miss Sunshine and Juno, anything Tarantino, anything by Pixar. The Big Blue (Luc Besson fan) … I could go on for months Elle, really I could. I can’t actually think of a movie I really don’t like.

I Thought Mother Nature Was A Girl?!?

by Weezafish

I’ve recently finished breast feeding our youngest. And THAT’S the start of a Mummy post if I ever read one.

I was sharing my body image concerns with hubby the other night; he’d reached for what he thought was something stuck on my belly, it turned out to be just a shadow of a fold. Eeek!

I told him that aside from having enough excess skin these days to make a Mini Me, I dreaded ‘Spaniels Ears’ boobs now that the milk wasn’t plumping them up anymore, and we got into a conversation about the drastic changes that take place to a womans body during and after childbirth.

I complained “Why does nature do that to a woman? Why can’t our skin and muscles be massively elastic, so we can spring back after childbirth? And why do my previously much-loved full and bouncy boobs have to become spaniels ears after breastfeeding? Can’t they just go back to being full and bouncy again?”

Clearly not, no matter how much I whined.

Hubby tried his best to cheer me up, he had a theory that he thought might help.

Hubby: “I think it’s about natures attempts to make you a Mother”

Me: “Huh?”

Hubby: “You remember that theory we read, about babies being cute so they get looked after?”

** Theory, by a renowned English Paediatrician, is that children are born with big eyes, cute noses, soft skin and hair which stays with them when they’re young, because if they didn’t look so damn adorable, we wouldn’t put up with the demands required to look after them. And they depend on us, hence they must be adorable. Interesting hey?

Anyhoo, I did remember the theory although I wasn’t sure where hubby was going with it.

Me: “What about it?”

Hubby: “Well if nature can do THAT, be THAT well planned – couldn’t it also maybe take steps to ensure that you stay with your baby and mother it? Your body is now the body of a mother, not a single girly”

I laughed.

Me: “You mean, you think Mother Nature takes away all my physical sexual attraction so I can’t go out and be a trollop? To keep me at home with my baby?

Mum’s don’t need to be attractive once they have attracted a father for their child, is that it?”

Hubby (and we’re both laughing now, so the cheer up worked): “It’s just a theory. Pay off for motherhood! You want to be a Mum, you cannot be a sexually active temptress as well”.

The laughing subsides.

Me: “So what about the Father?”

Hubby: “???”

Me: “Men don’t go through childbirth or breastfeed, which are the catalysts for the Mummying, if you will, change in womens bodys. So what happens to a mans body to keep Daddy at home too? Your body is unchanged in comparison to mine, but you are a father. Why does nature not take away your sexual attractiveness too, so you can’t go out and mess around?”

Hubby: “I dunno, maybe the pay off for Dad was enough that you had to go out and work hard to pay for everything”

Me: “Oh come on, 1950’s man, it’s not like that naturally you know that”

Hubby: “True, I know. In caveman times men and women stood side by side, fought and hunted together”

Me: “Women did get clubbed on the head as a form of foreplay mind you”

Hubby: “Yeah, but we were wild animals then. She was clubbed on the head because she’d probably scratch your eyes out and bite your dick off if you tried flirting. If man hadn’t have done that, the species would never had continued!”

Now we’re laughing again, at the thought of cavemen flirting and making small talk, but I hadn’t forgotten my point, Mister Hubby.

Me: “So? What’s Dad’s pay off for becoming a Dad and Mother Natures way of keeping him home and faithful, for the sake of his kids and his lovely wife?”

Hubby: “I don’t know, I really can’t think of one. Not that’s physically changing, in the way that women are affected. Mother Nature’s not very fair on this, is she?”

Me: (flicking my extra belly skin grumpily) “I’m beginning to think Mother Nature is a man”.

The little hummingbird got a camera for her 3rd birthday and I finally got back the use of my cell phone for the most part. She’s been snapping pictures left and right.

My husband downloaded all of the photos she’s been taking a few days ago and there’s nothing like seeing my ass up on the computer screen, taken from the perspective of a three-year old, to show me that while I’m never going to be “perfect”, my body could use some extra lovin’ from me.

No, not masturbation “lovin’”…. although I’d much rather masturbate than exercise. Who wouldn’t? I’ve never tried a spinning class but I’m thinking if you sit just right, you can have your cake and eat it too. Is that why spinning classes are so popular? Anyone?

Focus, me!

I’m talking about getting my body in better shape. I’m following my own plan of eating healthier but since Easter, I’ve been eating more crap and need to get back on track.

I’m looking at you Cadbury milk chocolate mini eggs with your perfectly crisp and sugary outer shell.

Damn you!

I don’t like to count calories or use a scale because then I feel like I become to obsessed with what I eat. A few days ago while staring blankly at my computer screen and eating a Dove chocolate egg, I thought maybe it would be more beneficial if instead of keeping a food diary of everything I eat, I should keep one of only the good food I eat every day along with what I do for exercise.

This way I wouldn’t have to look at anything I deem as ”food failures” that I may have eaten.

It can be in a journal, a notepad, even on post-its because I invented post-its. I’m also going to put it up on my new blog, The Good Food Diaries.

I’m starting this blog to document my good food diary along with recipes I’ll make that may be a success (fingers crossed) or a total failure.

You can also submit recipes.

It doesn’t necessarily have to be low-fat or low-calorie, as long as it’s fine in moderation. Email to thegoodfooddiaries@gmail.com

P.S. I’m still getting the food diaries blog in order so in the meantime, you can stare at him while you’re over there….

~~~~~

*The biggest congratulations to Izzy. I’m so happy for you!

Chocolate or any sweet treats – It’s helpful to have some sweet treats around at all times, preferably kept by the vodka. It’s especially useful when you accidentally plop your baby down in their crib as you were gently laying them down and while it didn’t faze them at all, you’re crying and almost hysterical. But I don’t know this from experience or anything. Ahem.

You’ll need more sweet treats and vodka as they get older; toddlerhood, childhood, tweenhood, teenhood, adulthood. Oh Shit!

Vodka – A no brainer.

Bathroom time – Just 5 or 10 minutes of time in the bathroom without having a child knocking and banging on the door while yelling maaaahhhmmeeee, maaaahhhmmeeee would be absolute bliss.

Rescue Remedy – If you drank all of the vodka in your house and are already out of the 6 pack of nyquil you got just last month, it’s rescue remedy to the rescue. I usually take it at night when my mind just doesn’t want to turn off. It has a good punch of alcohol in it. I’m sure you’re not seeing a theme here.

Slings and Arrows – This is one of my all time favorite shows. Paul Gross who plays artistic director Geoffrey Tennant is amazing. It’s a funny and quirky show and very helpful on the nights your baby or toddler will. not. sleep.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of the beautiful moms!

What are your mom must haves?

Before we knew it, it was time for him to go to OCS (Officer Candidate School) and as much as I prepared myself for my husband (of less than a year) to be gone for months, I found that I was far from prepared.

He was under enough stress when it came to getting ready but I unfortunately added to his stress.

In some ways I felt like he was abandoning me and I started picking ridiculous fights with him. I found that by doing so, I was distancing myself from him emotionally so it would be easier when he was gone.

I quickly learned that I would just end up feeling guilty and wanted to tell my husband how sorry I was but it wasn’t like I could just pick up the phone.

For the next 12 years his deployments never got easier and I missed him just as much as the first time he was deployed.

Sure, I became more self-sufficient all of those times I was alone (I pride myself on being somewhat of a plumbing ninja with all of the sinks and toilets I fixed over the years) but there was a huge part of me missing.

My husband.

Being a military wife is like being on the most thrilling but at the same time one of the scariest rollercoaster rides that you can experience.

Like being a mom.

I’ll never forget when I was 8 months pregnant with my daughter and we were living in Washington, D.C. My husband came home from work and I just knew something was going on. He told me they want to send him to Afghanistan in the next few weeks and he’ll be gone for a year.

I felt so selfish and guilty that I wanted somebody else to be deployed instead of my husband but after a very tense next couple of weeks, someone else was sent after all.

It turned out that once the powers that be found out my husband was recovering from a broken foot, he was deemed too much of a risk.

In all the years that he’s been in the Navy, the one thing that’s like fingers on a chalkboard to me are the times he was deployed and the most frequent comment I would get is Well, that’s what you signed up for.

It feels like the person saying that is dismissing my feelings. That’s probably why my mother-in-law was the worst offender when my husband was deployed.

Just because my husband is in the military doesn’t mean that it’s easier when he leaves or that we miss each other less. I feel in some ways it’s much harder because of the danger involved.

So, if there’s a military spouse in your life, give them a shoulder to lean on. And a hug. Hugs are always good.

Do you have a spouse in the military or one that travels frequently? How do you handle the separation? What would you like people to know?

This is one of my all time favorite recipes. My mom made it when I was younger so it’s definitely something I love making that gives me warm fuzzies.

This is also a very simple recipe which is right up my alley. I love serving the brownie pie with whip cream and sliced strawberries. It’s so good! A tip: microwave the slices 15-20 seconds before serving.

2 eggs

1 cup sugar

1/2 cup margarine, melted

1/2 cup all purpose flour

1/3 cup cocoa powder

1/4 tsp salt

1 tsp vanilla

1/2 cup chopped nuts (optional)

 Mix eggs in a bowl. Blend in sugar and melted margarine. Combine flour, cocoa, and salt and then add to egg mixture. Stir in vanilla and nuts. Pour into lightly greased 8 inch pie pan. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes or until almost set.

A few days ago the 3 of us did some window shopping. I came across a shop that had these signs and it was love at first sight.

This would be a really nice Monday morning i.v. drip.

~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~

There are no words for the loss of someone I’ve loved from my childhood through my adulthood. You will be missed, Adam.

~~~~~

 

~~~~~ 

~~~~~

~~~~~

The little hummingbird got a camera for her 3rd birthday a few weeks ago and it’s like toddlerazzi around here. I really don’t like having my picture taken but I’ve become the reluctant model for the hummingbird.

She loves to ambush me whenever I’m in the bathroom which is so funny to her. My dignity…..poof! But that’s why they’re so cute, right? So we don’t eat our young.  :^)

~~~~~

~~~~~

 ~~~~~

My husband has taken a week off from work so I’m taking a tiny break too. I don’t think I’ve actually stopped writing for a few days since I started my blog. It’s been pretty non-stop for nearly two years so this mama needs a few days to catch up on reading and check out what’s on television that doesn’t have to do with any whiny or singing cartoons. Woo hoo!

I first posted this on August, 10, 2011…..

~~~

~~~

~~~

~~~

~~~

~~~

~~~

~~~

*Permission is given to copy and/or print this with credit to me. xx