My uterus and some drunk lady walk into a bar…

I’m still having a pity party so I haven’t felt like writing that much lately. I went to an ob/gyn on Monday and it was so difficult. There were several pregnant women coming and going and there were a few times when I couldn’t help but break down.

The gyno said physically everything looks okay. The one problem is that I have fibroids and it’s his opinion that the miscarriage has caused them to flare up which could be why I’m in so much pain.

Right now I’m just going to wait and see if they get better. When I’ve had a few flare-ups in the past, it would take about 3 weeks to have everything settle down. He mentioned a few options if that doesn’t happen. One was a medication that would put my body in temporary menopause for about a month.

That was offered to me 5 or so years ago when I was having a flare up but with all the research I did, I decided against it. The medication is supposed to shrink fibroids. The thing is, it seems like you go through hell and then as soon as the medication gets out of your system, the fibroids go right back to growing.

The other option would be to get a myomectomy which would be to remove the fibroids and the surgery would basically be similar to a c-section. He said that it can be done laparoscopically but they might miss fibroids if there ends up being more than the two that we know of.

I want to have another child and my worry is I might not be able to after the myomectomy. This particular doctor said the chances of not being able to have another baby after this procedure would be low. But pre-hummingbird I had a female doctor tell me that she personally doesn’t think it would be something I’d want to do if I plan on having kids.

The way she explained it to me was if they remove the fibroids then my uterus might have some areas that aren’t as strong as other areas (she described it like a spiderweb) which might cause me to not be able to carry to full term. On the other hand the fibroids could cause problems while pregnant.

When it came to being pregnant with the little hummingbird, I didn’t have any problems except when I was 5 months pregnant. There was a flare up and for about 2 weeks I was in pure hell and thought I might lose her. Then things settled on their own and the pain went away. The doctor I had at the time monitored the growth of my fibroids while I was pregnant but there was never any harm to my daughter.

I know it’s not like I have to decide right this second about what to do but I was hoping to get some real insight from you lovely ladies since doctors don’t seem to know what they’re saying most of the time. I swear it’s like if you go to 5 different doctors for the same problem, you’ll get 5 different answers.

So, here’s my question to you. Has anyone out there gone through a myomectomy or taken the medication lupron that causes temporary menopause? Also, if you have/had fibroids how have you dealt with them?

If you don’t want your business out there then you can email me at elle dot mommyhood at gmail dot com. I feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place when it comes to these sucky options.

Any help is greatly appreciated because at this point I don’t know what to do. I’m definitely going to wait and see before I make any major decisions. To be honest as long as the fibroids I have aren’t a danger to my next pregnancy, I would deal with any kind of pain I had to.

The gynecologist put me on a lower progesterone birth control pill to see if that might help since progesterone is what feeds fibroids and is most likely why I had this flare up after I miscarried. (*A sidenote…my heart goes out to Maile and I’ve told her how sorry I am with what she’s going through but I also wanted to say that you have been on my mind a lot and I wish I could take your pain away. xx)

The doctor mentioned the fibroids could have been what caused the loss of the baby and I’ve read countless articles over the years so I know it’s a possibility. My instincts tell me that wasn’t the issue but I’ll just never know.

Okay, enough of that. I saw this video when hurricane Irene was headed for the east coast and this drunk woman is my hero of the day.  ;^)

~~~

~~~

Comments { 3 }

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Mary Poppins is a parenting inspiration. Alternate title: Marianna will shank your ass if you eff with her and parenting thoughts from the *almost* left handed amputee.

This is a guest post from my adorable and hilarious Canadian friend, Marianna Annadanna from Snappy Surprise. She’s also one of the founders of Cheesy Bloggers which is an open, inclusive space to be cheesy, funny, clever, and to join up with others like you! 

In my humble opinion I would recommend locking yourself in the closet and reading all of Marianna’s posts but if that’s not an option because your kids will be banging on the door while yelling Maaahhmeeee then here are some posts from her you should check out. Television is *delicious*, At least cough up a bunny, My happy place scared the bejezus out of meThat’ll learn ya, hubbyHave you heard? I’m AWESOME, and I can’t leave out her dock shrapnel wound post that had her thisclose to becoming an amputee: I’m going to sue my best friend.

~~~

Q and A with Marianna.

Elle:  If you could be stuck in an elevator with anyone, who would it be?

Marianna: Um, Hubby, because he would keep me from chewing my own arm off and using it as a baton to break free. And Jimmy Fallon. 

Elle: If the zombie apocalypse happened tomorrow, which weapon would you want to have to fight these brain eaters?

A. a flame thrower.

B. an unlimited supply of ninja throwing stars. 

C. a chainsaw.

D. a shoelace because you’re bad ass.

E. other and what would it be?

F. none of the above, I want to be a damn zombie!

Marianna: B. Ninja throwing stars sounds good.

Elle: What song(s) makes you want to dance around your house and/or brings you back to your teen years?

Marianna: So many!  Anything from Dance Mix 93, 94, or 95.  Probably the Fast and the Furious soundtrack.  Crabbucket by K-os… look that one up!  Teagan and Sarah are my true fav dancing band though. 

Elle: Favorite guilty pleasure?

Marianna: Young and the Restless.  Except I don’t really feel guilty about that.  Same with the Twilight books (of which I have read 5 times).  Ya know, honestly, it *might* be twitter…

Elle: What’s one of the worst movies you’ve seen?

Marianna: The good thing about bad movies is they’re either so bad they’re GOOD, or you forget them altogether. 

Elle: If you could send any celebrity/reality star into space so you’d never had to hear about them again, who would it be?

Marianna: SNOOKIE. And the rest of her idiot brigade. 

Elle: A weird habit?

Marianna: I have to turn the tv volume up in even-numbered increments.  I know.  Brutal. 

Elle: What’s one of your favorite books?

Marianna: Jane Eyre!  Lonesome Dove!  And maybe Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. 

Elle: If you could drop everything and go anywhere (real or fantasy) in the world, where would it be?

Marianna: Into the Mary Poppins streetchalk painting.  Without that option, Paris. 

~~~

It’s safe to say I’ll be a fairly demanding parent.

When my dear friend Elle began hunting for guest posters, I wasn’t sure I was the best person for the job.  You see, Elle is so sweet, kind, genuine, and funny.  I, on the other hand, am kind of an asshole.

And on top of that, I don’t have kids, so I rarely have helpful advice for her in the parenting department. I’m pretty useless, actually.

HOWEVER, my uterus has been pretty riled up lately, screaming at me to grow something inside it, so I’ve been doing some thinking about what kind of parent I want to be.  Alors, here is my list of goals for my yet-unborn children.

Elle, I know you’ll find this extremely helpful.  You’re welcome.

What my kids will inherit from me:

Remarkable grace.  And the ability to be tolerant, open-minded, and understanding.  They had better not EVER assume that they know the whole story.  They need to hold their judgments.  Unless they’re judging Snookie.  Snookie is an idiot of immense proportion.

What my kids will have to inherit from
someplace else:

The confidence to under-achieve.   What I mean is, the confidence to know they are “successful” even if they don’t over-accomplish every little stupid thing in their whole entire lives.  I don’t want them to lose their marbles like – ahem – someone I know.  I want them be happy, not stressed.

What my kids will inherit from me:

Willingness to read.  I don’t really care what they read, as long as they read something.  I think I might get them started on Twilight.

What my kids will have to inherit from
someplace else:

A distant relationship with television and the internet.  Unless they’re watching Ellen.  Or Jimmy Fallon.  Or So You Think You Can Dance.  Or The Young and The Restless.  Or Roseanne. Or unless they’re blogging.  Or reading blogs. Or watching Youtube. Or tweeting.  No Facebook though.  I HATE Facebook.

What my kids will inherit from me:

Artistic ability. They should write, or draw, or act, or dance, or make macaroni castles. A creative outlet to express themselves is KEY.  As long as they don’t collect old beer cans and build a beer can wall in the backyard, I’ll be on board. Maybe even then.

What my kids will have to inherit from
someplace else:

Athletic ability.  In team sports. With other people.  For the FUN of it.  With Hubby to drive them to their games and practices, because I’m too lazy for that.

What my kids will inherit from me:

Honesty.  They should be straightforward and out-spoken.  Passive aggression annoys me and I won’t receive it well from anyone – fruit of my loins or otherwise.  They should speak their minds.

What my kids will have to inherit from
someplace else:

Politeness.  Those little brats better be nice to people.  They can have their own opinion but they better choose the right time to open their big mouths.

Finally, what my kids will inherit from me:

Intelligence.  They’ll be smart.  I know it. They’ll even be smart enough to know that I’m always right.  Oh… and English and Science and stuff.

And what my kids will have to inherit from
someplace else:

Patience.  I’ll be there IN A MINUTE!  If those little shits yell “Maaahhhhhhmm” one more time I’m gonna LOSE it.

So.  Elle. There you have it.  My top ten list of things all kids oughta be.  Get on it, already, won’t ya?

~If you would like to write a guest post, whether you have a blog or not, email me at elle dot mommyhood at gmail dot com. I promise you I don’t bite and the only thing that might possibly make me not want to use your guest post is if you wrote about how you want to be just like Paris Hilton or Snookie.

Comments { 4 }

Total Recall Sunday: Queue Me Up.

This is a post I wrote last summer when we just moved out of our house in D.C. and we were staying in a hotel while waiting for the movers.

 Queue Me UP

July 28, 2010

Last week when I was without a computer, I went to use one at our hotel’s “business center”. They had two computers, one was from the Stone Age, the other from Roman Times.

When I went in one morning, I saw that some guy was on the Roman one. Damn. I hadn’t used the Stone Age one yet, but I was there when the hubby used it the day before and it wasn’t a pretty sight.

I was trying to do this, that, and the other and quickly found out that the fraking computer couldn’t do the simplest things. I would type something or click on a link and it had a 5 minute delay.

So while I’m waiting and waiting, the computer goes apeshit and starts opening up new windows. I kept on trying to x them off (get your mind out of the gutter) but I couldn’t keep up and 60 windows opened up.

I kept on looking over at the guy next to me, hoping that he’d get up soon so I could use that computer. He was on Netflix, looking at his queue for a good 30 minutes. I was getting really annoyed and hemming and hawing, hoping this guy would get the picture.

Of course he didn’t and I took to twitter mentioning that this guy is just staring blankly at his Netflix queue.

Before I could finish tweeting, the computer froze up. I kept trying to shut it down and restart it. I couldn’t just say screw it and walk away from the computer because I didn’t want to leave my twitter account open. While I continuously clicked on Ctrl+Alt+Del, the guy looks over at me and asks if I have a Netflix account.

Why. did. I. say. yes?

He said that he couldn’t figure out how to rearrange the order of his movies and delete others. I tried to explain what to do but since the computer was so crappy, it wouldn’t budge.

While waiting for his computer to do something, the guy told me there were several movies in his queue that he had to delete because some of them had less than 3.8 stars. Um, okay.

Weird guy: How do you decide what movies to put in your queue?

Me: It usually has a lot to do with the actors that are in the movie and the plot.

*crickets*

He looked at me like I was an alien who just ran over a kitten with my spaceship.

Weird guy: You don’t go by the number of stars the movie gets?

Me: Not usually since the ratings are subjective.

Weird guy: So you have movies in your queue that have less than 3.8 stars?

Me: Uh huh. Thinking to myself I need to get logged out of the other computer and get the hell away from this weird guy. Also wondering why he has such a hard on for 3.8 stars.

Weird guy: Do you know anything about this movie; points to the number one movie on his queue, 10 Things I Hate About You.

Me: No, sorry. I haven’t seen it. (Liar, I’ve only seen it about 20 times.)

Weird guy: Well do you think I would like it?

Me: How many stars does it have? (heh)

Weird guy: 3.8

Me: Sure. (Yeah, right. Because a weirdo in his 60’s would just love that kind of movie. Uh wait, he just might.)

I start gesturing to one of the guys at the reception desk and tell him the computer is frozen while Mr. Weirdo McWeirdyson continues down his list of movies.

The reception guy helps me log off the Stone Age computer and I say a quick sorry, gotta go to the weird guy and leave him to his 3.8 star rated movies. I went back to the hotel room and told my hubby that we have to go and get a laptop right. now.

*I got a netbook because of all the features it had i.e it was cute. I soon found out it was just too small i.e I’m getting old and couldn’t see the screen that well. A few days ago we went to exchange it for a regular sized laptop and I’m in lurve. It’s my new baby and I’ve even named it Tobias, Toby for short.

While waiting forever for someone to help us get the computer out of lockdown at Best Buy (can’t they have more than one key, and why does that person with the sainted key always seem to be missing), I was thinking how that movie Inception with Leo DiCaprio looks pretty cool.

Then I started thinking of the movie This Boy’s Life that he was in and how it was based on the true story of writer Tobias Wolff. When I finally got the computer in my hands, I automatically called it Toby. I’m glad I wasn’t thinking of the guy that was “helping” us or my new laptop would be called dumbass.

~~~

You can link a post you wrote awhile back that you love but it possibly went unnoticed. Hell, it can even be a post you did last week. Basically, there aren’t any strict rules.

The linky will take you to a new page but after you link the post, I’ll put the link to your post on this page for better access. 

P.S. When you link up it says to leave a comment afterwards (not on this particular linky) but you don’t have to unless you really want to. No problemo.

Powered by Linky Tools

Click here to enter your link and view this Linky Tools list…

1. Reasons  To Skip The Housework~Places That Should Have Drive Thrus.

2. Not My Year Off~ The Babymobile.

3. But Wait! There’s More…~And people who are uglier than you and I, they take what they need and just leave.

4. Life On The Domestic Front~Bathing Suit Trauma.

5. Life On The Domestic Front~NOBODY Gets Metal Chickens.

6. Truth Mama~Monster-in-law Behaviors.

7. Feminist Christian Socialism~Autism Is Kicking My Ass.

Comments { 2 }

Uncomfortably numb.

*I wrote down what I’m feeling and it’s probably a bunch of gibberish but I’m not reading it back or else I won’t post it so I’m sure there are spelling errors and all that jazz.

I’ve tried to keep it together when it comes to the miscarriage but by Saturday night I completely lost my shit. I’m sure the meltdown I had could have been worse but I have so many emotions and thoughts racing around in my head and it feels like my heart will never be the same. My husband has absolutely no idea what to say or do even though I’ve tried to talk to him several times.

I think for the first 4 or 5 days I was just feeling numb. While I was really upset over the loss, I figured that would be the worst of it. I wasn’t even fucking close. Everything has been irritating me and I’ve been laying in bed whenever I can. Part of it is because of the physical effects, the other is because I’ve been throwing myself a pity party.

I *finally* found a psychologist though. That in itself was difficult because of my insurance but also because it is so hard to actually make that phone call for the first appointment.

I had my first session with “Dr. Sweetly” last Friday. I unloaded so much shit within an hour and a half and felt a little better. I was also relieved because I really like her. I was scared she wouldn’t be the therapist for me since you just never know and might need to see a few before you find the right one you mesh with. As soon as she greeted me in the waiting room I knew I hit the jackpot.

A few hours later the cramping I’ve been having got so bad and hurt so much that I felt like the pain was going to split me in half. I called the P.A. at my doctor’s office but they close at noon on Friday so I had to go to a walk in clinic. At the time I was also still having awful pain from my sinus infection so when I went to the clinic I wrote that I needed to see the doctor for both things.

When I was called back and doubled over from the cramps and pain I was having, the first thing the medical assistant said was “they don’t deal with miscarriages there so I’m on my own.” Um, well fuck.

I’m really bad at hiding my feelings and by that point I was doing the ugly cry. My head felt like it was going to explode and I was having awful pain in my abdomen. The doctor came in and reiterated about not being able to “deal with or talk about (my) miscarriage”.

He said he’s only allowed to prescribe a medication for the pain that I’ve taken before which doesn’t do shit. A shot of nyquil would be more helpful. As I was walking into the waiting room (nobody else was in there except the hubby and hummingbird….and the receptionist) I sort of lost my shit then.

I was crying and saying this was completely pointless and totally wasted our time. I’m not very proud to say I dropped some choice words in front of my daughter, which normally I’m careful about doing, but I felt so screwed over and was in the worst pain. I would go as far as saying that it was almost as bad as when I was in labor.

I think it was because I had the two things going on, I wasn’t getting much sleep because of the pain which I know made it even worse, and the stress and emotions were just too much on my body. So, we had no choice but to go from the walk in clinic straight to the ER. On a Friday night. Oy!

We don’t live in that big of a city but the place was pretty full. It’s not like I’m looking for people in health care to drop to their knees and tell me how sorry they are for what I’m going through but I felt everyone I came across seemed so cold.

When the ER nurse called my name and brought me back to the curtained room he said so I see you have some sinus pain and a little cramping. Seriously?! I understand that you have to desensitize yourself somewhat when you’re in that profession but just a little bit of compassion would have helped.

I laid there for almost 3 hours before anyone even came to administer some meds but in the meantime I had to listen to the staff talk about what they were going to order for dinner and hear in detail about how one place makes the chicken they serve too spicy.

The one funny thing about being in the ER is after the meds I was given started kicking in, I started taking pictures of my finger. My hubby was walking around with the hummingbird in her stroller which isn’t an easy feat because we rarely use it anymore (and my daughter hates being stuck in it) but we knew we should bring it along in case she actually got sleepy. We got to the ER around 7:30 pm which is close to her bedtime.

E.T. phone home.

~~~

I kept on taking more pictures of my cool glowing red finger because the meds were really working some magic and pretty soon I started thinking when it comes to taking cell phone pics, I’m so freaking awesome. There I was in my little room in the ER having a photo shoot with my finger.

Then I thought holy shit, next I can take photos of the hospital socks on my feet and it will be genius. Yep, I was as loopy as they come with medicated induced grandeur. But thankfully I got distracted and the pictures of my feet didn’t happen. You’re welcome.

We finally left the ER a little after midnight and the hummingbird was freaking wired as can be. The doctor did very little for me except give me some pain relief and of course told me I should go to my regular doctor.

On Tuesday I did just that. Let me clarify; I normally see my Dr.’s physican assistant because last fall when I went to my doctor & told him I’m feeling really depressed and he refused to help I thought eff this guy. I know I need a new dr. but with my Tricare insurance the way it is, the only other primary doctors available right now suck to be honest.

While I was seeing the P.A., he set it up so I can have an ultrasound on Friday (today) and then this coming Monday I’m scheduled to see a gynecologist. In the meantime the P.A. was going to give me more medication to give me some relief since it wouldn’t be until the next week when I would see the gyno. I still have that appointment although the thought of dealing with another heartless doctor makes me sick.

 While we were talking, my primary doctor walked in the room not realizing the P.A. was with a patient and started walking back out. The P.A. stopped him and asked for his opinion. Then I thought phuckity phuck because my primary probably wouldn’t even prescribe water if it was needed, he’s that bad.

When the P.A. brought my primary doc up to date and told him he was going to give me more meds so I can make it through the week, Dr. Asshole said Absolutely Not! Grrrr! He said all that would do would mask the pain.

Okay, you might want to cover your eyes but what the fuck guy?! I feel like hell and I actually can understand his thinking (okay, not really although I understand people will have a difference of opinion…but as my mom says, my primary doctor is as fucking loony as they come) but I don’t give a shit if it masks the pain. It helps and I have a wild 2-year-old so it’s not like I really have any time to relax.

I did get in contact with the babysitter we’ve used before and who we trust but she’s in the middle of moving so she isn’t able to look after the hummingbird until next week when I have my next appointment with my therapist.

After having another mini meltdown, they decided the best thing to do was to go back to the ER so I wouldn’t have to wait for the ultrasound. Back we went and this time it was in the early afternoon and not much waiting. Also, I had a better experience with the nurses and the ER doctor.

The ultrasound didn’t show an infection and the Dr. said that in his opinion he thinks that part of the reason I’m still having problems is because of everything going on and because I wasn’t treated properly the first time around as far as pain management and he felt that with my depression and anxiety it just made my pain worse.

He gave me some loopy meds and while I’m starting to feel like I’m on the mend, I’m still a wreck. My cramping and lower back pain is almost too much to bear still. And the emotions I’ve been having along with the hormones make me feel like a basket case.

I know miscarriage usually happens because something is wrong but I was telling my husband last night how I can’t help but feel guilty because in the last month I was on 3 very stong antibiotics and some pain meds my ENT doc, Dr. Cool, gave me for the raging sinus infection I had.

He sees it differently although he won’t tell me what he’s feeling and I told him I can’t help but think how it was when we got the first ultrasound pictures of the little hummingbird.

I was just over 9 weeks pregnant and my daughter was a tiny ball with stumpy arms and legs. It seemed so surreal that I was pregnant but looking back, the wee little hummingbird that we saw in the ultrasound pics has turned into the most amazing little girl. I’ve heard people say once you have a child it’s like your heart is now outside of our chest and I feel that’s so true.

Even though I think I was only a few weeks into this pregnancy and might not have even found out I was pregnant if it wasn’t for intuition (I think I would have thought the miscarriage was just a really awful period), I can’t help but think about what this child would be like.

To make things worse my crazy in-laws are coming for a visit next Friday and staying for 4 days. Thankfully they’re staying at a hotel but when they visit they’re here at our house from the early morning until late at night so I don’t really get a break from them.

I really have no idea how I’m going to handle them, especially my MIL and her knocking me down every chance she gets. This time around my feelings are so raw.

My mom and sister know about the miscarriage but my in-laws don’t. At first I was thinking maybe if they did know I would get a slight break from my mother-in-law but I seriously doubt it. I’m thinking she would find a way to be even more horrible so we’re not saying anything.

Time to sharpen that shank again.

Comments { 22 }

You say it’s your birthday…

To the most incredible and beautiful mom I know…
 

Happy Birthday!! 

~~~

Here are some things to brighten your big day…

 
 
                                                                       ~~~
 
                                                                          
                                                                       ~~~
 
 
                                                                       ~~~
 
 
                                                                      ~~~
 
Big hugs…
 
 
                                                                      ~~~
 
And sweet dreams…
 
 
                                                                     ~~~
 
Love you mom!
xoxo,
me, the hubby, and the little hummingbird.
 
Wait…Stop! Hammer time!
 
 
 
                                                                       ~~~
 
We can’t forget Maisy…
 
 
 
                                                                   ~~~
 
Or the kitty your son-in-law cat napped out of its own yard heeheehee
 
 
                                                                    ~~~
          
                                                                    ~~~
 
For all the times I played Falco that one summer…
 
         
                                                                    ~~~ 
 
And for all the times we would sing this in the car…
 
         
                                                                    ~~~
Comments { 5 }

Rock The Oven with Ryan Ann: Funnel Cakes…nom nom.

*Elle’s note~When Ryan Ann from Live, Laugh, Love, Bake told me she was doing funnel cakes for her first Rock the Oven post, I might have gotten a lot a little excited. I moved to the small town of “Footloose” when I was younger and it was a very tourist-y place.

One of the things I remember about it is they had places that sold funnel cakes all over the small downtown area. To me it seemed funnel cakes was to Footloose what Starbucks is to, well, everywhere. One of the happy memories I have of that place is the yummy smell of funnel cakes and the occasions when I would get one. Nom nom nom.

I am so happy to have Ry contributing to my blog and she is such a sweetie, pun intended. I told her I wanted to title the post I effing LOVE the shite out of Funnel Cakes!! (that’s the cleaned up version) but went for a tamer title. Without further ado, here’s Ryan Ann…

~~~

Funnel Cakes

Baking is my little piece of sanity. When my world is trying to implode, I love that I can take a few simple (or not so simple) ingredients, use my own two (not so little) hands and create something that is freaking delicious.

Of course, my other piece of sanity is music, and if I put the two together? Watch out cuz I have been known to dance around my kitchen like a TOTAL jag off while baking. But more on that another time. LOL

While I do try and bake everything I can from scratch, it is not a requirement. You will NEVER find me looking down my nose at someone for baking from a package. I really don’t like food snobs, man.

For me, it’s not about HOW you make something, it’s about the LOVE that you pour into what you are making. Seriously, I still draw hearts in the peanut butter when I make sandwiches for my kiddies and the hubs. They don’t know it’s there once I close the sandwich, but *I* know.

It may sound silly, call me crazy, but I can totally taste the difference between when I bake something just to get it done, and when I take my time and pour the love into it. I know, I told ya, crazy!

Sure, maybe it is a subconscious thing, but whatever. The point is, I enjoy it, my family enjoys it and my friends enjoy it. What more could I ask for? (a Kitchen Aid mixer, pleeeeease?)

For this section, I’m just going to wing it and see where my mood takes me… But one thing is for sure: You can look forward to lots of tested (in my kitchen) and true, yummy recipes, some funny (and not so funny) stories, and you may pick up some tips and tricks along the way.

I never censor myself when I write about my baking… If I mess up, you will hear about it. After all, that is how we learn, isn’t it?

Anyways, I thought I would start with something simple. FUNNEL CAKES! What is better than some fried up Carnival food? Homemade Carnival food, of course! And awaaaaaay we goooo!

You will need:
3 cups flour
1/3 cup white granulated sugar
2 tsp baking powder (NOT baking soda)
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
3 whole eggs
1 tsp vanilla
2 1/4 cups milk
Canola oil to fry em up in
Powdered sugar to top em

1. Heat your oil in a wide deep pan. You want it to get to 350. I don’t have a thermometer, so I wait a while and drop a little of the batter into the oil. If it starts sizzling away, you’re good to go.

2. In a large bowl, combine your dry ingredients and give em a stir to combine.

3. Whisk in your eggs, milk and vanilla. You want it to look like a thin pancake batter, so if it is too thick, add more milk, a little bit at a time.

4. Now, you are supposed to use a funnel, hence the name Funnel Cake, but I was too lazy to dig through my cabinets and find mine. So, take a piping bag or a large Ziploc baggie, ladle some batter into it, seal it and snip a small portion of the bottom corner off.

Pinch the end between your fingers til you get over the oil, otherwise…. well, you WILL make a huge mess and you will NOT be very happy with me….at least until you eat one of these babies!

5. Holding the bag about 2 inches above the hot oil (please be careful) start dispensing the batter. You want to make a large circle first, and then just go crazy filling it in with squiggles and loops, if that makes sense. LOL If that doesn’t make sense to you, just look at the picture of the finished funnel cake and you’ll see what I mean. 🙂

6. Cook for about 2-3 minutes and then caaaarefully flip (I’ve found that its easiest to flip using tongs) and cook for another 2-3 minutes. You want it to be a deep golden brown AND done on the inside. It may take you a few tries to get it down, but don’t sweat it. You have PLENTY of batter.

7. Remove from oil and drain on paper towels. Give it a few minutes to cool off and then sprinkle a generous amount of powdered sugar over the top. Or caramel sauce with ice cream, or chocolate syrup, or MY favorite, strawberry jam with a lil powdered sugar.

8. Eat that sucker! 😀

I hope you will give it a try, and even more than that, I hope you enjoy!
Ry

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From the woman who *didn’t* bring you Sex and the City; Squirrels and the Country.

Sex and the City was one of my favorite shows. I’ve heard critics and others rip apart the movies, especially the more recent one, but I still love them and I’ll always be a fan.

Even so, I give you Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha summed up in 5 seconds…as Squirrels and the Country. It might take you 10 seconds to read if the little one you’d rather not claim right now is causing chaos.

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I’ve had several people not ask me how I do these not at all awesome cartoon thingies when I myself can’t draw to save my life. Well, I’ll tell you how even though you don’t want to know. Your welcome.

I make the box outline, the blood (sadly this cartoon doesn’t have any), and anything else that requires coloring with Microsoft Paint.

I use picnik.com for everything else including the stickers they have which included the trees and squirrels in this one. It also has several other awesome features for free but I finally broke down and paid for the premium service which wasn’t much money considering the not at all awesome it helps me create.

There’s some copy, paste, and saving when I use the two thingies together. I’m so effing technical, ya’ll.

I use Picnik any time I add pictures to my posts because it has features that let you crop photos, resize, watermark pics, boost colors, do collages, etc. And nope, despite sounding like an infomercial, they aren’t paying me anything to say this but if they wanted to, they could pay me in pizza since that’s what I’m craving right now.

Just so I can feel better, here is the Dexter-ish version of this cartoon.

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