Total Recall: What I thought would be a sweet children’s book has turned into a zombie nightmare.

I know I’ve already posted today but I decided to post again since I’m gong to be really busy this week doing super secret writing stuff. Okay, it’s not super secret or anything. I’m just going to be writing stuff.

If you’re not familiar with it, Total Recall is just another fancy name for “this is a recycled post”. I hope you enjoy!

Oh, one other thing, I have officially decided to stick with my original blog name. I had actually planned on writing Madonna’s song, Papa Don’t Preach, as a post and instead of having it say But I made up my mind, I’m keeping my baby I was going to put keeping my blog name in place of baby and then I was going to see if anyone noticed. Yeah, I need sleep.

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What I thought would be a sweet children’s book has turned into a zombie nightmare.

January 11, 2011

 

I bought my daughter several books for Christmas but one of the books wasn’t what I was expecting. Since I avoided doing my holiday shopping in stores, I got these books online.

Deciding on a book for her isn’t based on reviews, it’s more from the plot and illustrations, but I still like reading the reviews because some of them can be pretty ridiculous.

There will be someone who says a book about a bunny traumatized their child or something along those lines and I always get a laugh from it. But one of the books I got for her was creepy. So, I am now one of those people who writes about a children’s book that traumatizes me, although I’m writing it here and not on the site where I got it.

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I’ve always had a wild imagination and to this day, I’m afraid of the dark. *whispers* I still sleep with a nightlight on. By the time I go to sleep, my hubby will have been asleep for a few hours. As soon as I turn off the lamp, I think of every scary movie I’ve seen and my imagination runs wild by thinking there’s probably a serial killer under the bed.

The most common thing I think about as soon as I turn out the light is that some zombie is going to crawl on his hands and knees across the bedroom floor, come over to my side of the bed, reach up and grab me, and will then proceed to eat my face off.

I know, I know, that would be impossible….because of simple zombie facts. First off, zombies are heavy breathers and growl. I would hear it before it even got to me. Also, my hubby is the one who sleeps closest to the bedroom door. Everyone knows that a zombie would attack the first person he sees.

While the zombie would be eating the brains of my husband or going for his jugular, that would give me a chance to hop out of bed, grab my daughter from her room, and run out of the house. The cat is on her own but I’ve never seen a zombie eat a cat so I think she would be safe anyway.

It’s not like I’ve given this scenario much thought though. *coughcough*

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After I got the books for my daughter, I read each one before I wrapped them. When I read “the book that shall remain nameless”, I turned to the first page and thought it was very sweet. After I read the second page, I could totally relate. Then I turned to the third page and almost peed myself with fear.

The mom crawls on her hands and knees across the bedroom floor to look at her son. If he’s asleep, she picks him up and sings a lullaby. All of my irrational zombie fears came to the surface and I freaked. The illustration of her peering at him in his bed while she’s on her hands and knees is burned into my brain.

I usually check on my daughter a billion times a night before I go to bed and there are times when I’ve been in her room watching her sleep and she’ll start opening her eyes. I hit the floor as fast as I can and quickly crawl out. So, I get that part of this book but I still find it damn creepy.

Like when her son grows up and moves into his own place. She drives across town in the middle of the night, uses a ladder to climb up to his bedroom window (this guy really needs to get a security system and fast), then picks him up and rocks him while he sleeps as she sings a lullaby.

I don’t get warm fuzzies from this book, rather the heebie jeebies. At the end, it shows him rocking his own child while singing the same lullaby. So that means the creepiness continues.

Not only that, how is he even supposed to have sex with his wife so they can have a kid when his mother always pops up in the middle of the night. If I was that guy’s wife, I’d have mommy dearest charged with breaking and entering and get her some much-needed therapy for her boundary issues.

That reminds me, I need to call my mother-in-law and thank her for my daughter’s Christmas presents.

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I’ll let you in on a little secret…my hubby hates that I write.

My husband has never liked that I write. When I started back in July of 2010, his only request was anonymity but I don’t think he expected me to keep up the blogging for this long. Or for it to start going as far as it has been.

It has nothing to do with what I write or what I say about his parents, it’s more that I like to set aside time to write and he becomes, I don’t know, jealous maybe? It’s possible he doesn’t like that my writing takes the time I have away from him or maybe he feels that I’m just wasting my time.

He not a jerk by any manys although he does have some asshole moments but it’s not like he demands I stop and I know he never would. He’s a man of very few words so he doesn’t tell me the exact reasons why it bothers him which drives me crazy.

The thing is though, I’ll read posts to him every now and then that I wrote and I can see that he likes it. He’ll even ask me “Did you post that one thing you wrote yet? Did ya, did ya?” and he becomes excited. I’ll tell him I’m not finished with it yet and then he’ll seem so bummed out.

When I started my group website, A Nervous Tic Motion, he was less than thrilled. Well more like really pissed.

I think after all this time he’s finally coming around…. even if it’s just a tad. When he does something dorky, one of the first things he says is well, there’s a blog post for you.

For Christmas he gave me a card and when you lift Santa out of the chimney, he farts. How romantic, right? ha! My husband looked at me and said you have to mention the card in a post.

Even if he’s not getting used to it, as my mom would say, tough titties. Writing makes me happy. I’ve met some amazing people from blogging so I’m here to stay.

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Rockit Saturday: Glen Hansard

It’s New Year’s Eve and I’m watching my all time favorite…. the Twilight Zone marathon. The hubby and I have a bottle of champagne but it probably won’t get opened since I still feel like shite. I think a few hot toddys are in order though.

I’ll make this short since Penny is doing her best to make it hard to write this. She’s 6 months old now and I think she’s teething. Here’s the Teethinator chomping on my foot while I was typing this.

Also there have been some who have been telling me that I should keep my blog name the same so I’m rethinking that. It’s not the smartest move to decide to make a change when you’re downing codeine cough medicine, feel like death, and you’re a blonde. Heh.

I’ve been blogging for a year and a half and I think I was just getting antsy and wanted some kind of change. Well that and my depression and anxiety have been eating away at me big time for the past few weeks but that’s for another post. I will say that dealing with it wanted me to have a clean slate so to speak.

So, on to Rockit Saturday!

Glen Hansard…his music can give me chills, he’s amazing in concert, and he’s Irish….I’m a sucker for a guy with an accent.

                               

                    

                    

Happy New Year!!

 

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What In The Elle?

The votes are in and What In The Elle? is the new name for This Is Mommyhood. The change will be gradual and I’ll probably keep my original blog name for my Facebook page or else then I’ll have to start a new page from scratch and I’m a lazy ass when it comes to that.

My hubby and I were talking about the name change and I was telling him that while I’m excited to have the name change, at the same time it feels weird even though I’m doing it since I write about so much more than just mommyhood.

That’s when he asked if I gave the option for people to vote that I keep the original name and I said effity eff, nope, I didn’t even think about that. D’oh! So, if I end up keeping the original name after all of this, please don’t turn into a zombie, sneak into my house, and eat my brains.

                                       

 I’ve been thinking about doing a post a week about different things that have been going on in my world. Who wouldn’t want to know nobody what dorky argument my hubby and I had that week, what movies and music I’m listening to, what’s been happening with the hummingbird, etc.

Let’s get rolling….

The dorkiest argument me and the hubs got into this week. – I thought my hubby had two weeks off for the holidays and while he was starting to drive me crazy, we’ve been sick and he didn’t tell me he was going back to work until the night before. I felt like death and our awesome sitter wasn’t available. I wanted to strangle him since there was no way I could keep up with my 2-year-old because I was so sick.

Then he told me that he wrote that he was going back to work on the kitchen calendar. Um, okay, that really helps….not! I asked him why he didn’t just tell me and then we went back and forth over it. There was more to it but even in the middle of the argument I was thinking how I couldn’t believe that we were arguing over something like this. The joys of marriage.

Husbands….can’t live with them, can’t strangle them.

Being sick – I have a double ear infection/sinus infection combo. Yay me! I don’t normally get so many colds but this has been a banner year for me. It feels like I’ve been sick forever and I’ve been thinking how I take advantage of feeling healthy.

Since the Nyquil is starting to kick my butt, I’ll wrap up my blabbering.

Movies–  I really suck at giving reviews to anything and instead I usually say that so and so is effing awesome and you have to see it but I’ll try my best. I’ve been stuck in bed and watching movies since I’m sick.

It’s gotten intense since the Nyquil is taking over and there was a spirited battle of rock, paper, scissors but the Nyquil won this round and will be doing most of the writing.

I love all kinds of movies but I’ve been so out of the loop since the little hummingbird was born so I’m either too exhausted to stay up and watch a dvd with the hubby by the time she’s in bed or just too busy.

This probably only makes sense to me but my favorite movies are beautifully depressing ones. They’re beautifully acted, directed, and filmed but they’re not always the most feel good type of movies. Most of them relate to real life and there’s usually not a happy ending involved.

House of Sand and Fog. This movie is absolute perfection in my opinion and came out in 2003. It has Jennifer Connelly, Ben Kingsley, Shohreh Aghdashloo (who plays Ben Kingsley’s wife and is incredible in the film), Jonathan Ahdout (who plays his son), and Ron Eldard who did a really good job at being a douche in the film.

It starts out with a simple premise. A woman gets evicted from her house because of a mistake and a man buys the house at an auction. Throughout the movie, things just keep on escalating because of the woman trying to get her house back and then near the ending….well, I can’t give it away.

This is a must see movie, one that I’ve seen countless times because I think it’s such an amazing film.

 

Candy. Just a warning. This movie can be very disturbing at times and it has drug use and prostitution in it so make sure the kiddies are in bed.

This movie came out in 2006 and has Heath Ledger as Dan, Abbie Cornish as Candy, and Geoffrey Rush as Casper. The film has three sections…Heaven, Earth, and Hell. It’s shows Dan and Candy diving deeper into Herion use.

Needless to say the film is dark but the actors are incredible and seamless. I had plenty to write about this movie but I don’t want to give out any spoilers. All I can say is just see it. That is if you like beautifully depressing films.

                            

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Dun, dun, dun. You get to decide, so vote damn it.

*Leesepea pointed out that she says “What The Hell” and I’m with her on that but someone already bought the domain name (What The Elle). *sad face* sniff, sniff.

I was planning on changing my blog name to This Is Elle but then I started thinking that I also love What In The Elle? So, people of the interwebs and those coming over from The Bloggess who might never come back over to my site again but hopefully will, what should it be?

I uploaded a poll thingamajig but I don’t know if it’s going to work so if not, just leave your choice in the comment section. You get to choose…You get to vote. This is like some Dancing With The Stars shit over here.

[poll id='2']

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Oops, I did it again.

Not only did the little hummingbird get sick a few days ago, now all three of us have some kind of plague. It seems like just last month I was bitching about….wait, it was just last month that I was bitching about being sick.

I know getting sick when you have a 2 year old comes with the territory but I actually thought being a stay at home mom would cut down on the dictator the cute little angel getting sick.

Which reminds me (not being sick but being a stay at home mom), I was starting to think something was wrong because my hubby has been home from work for over a week and hasn’t really been getting on my nerves. Well, ding ding ding, it’s finally happened.

I was worried that I was going to turn into June Cleaver and had nightmares of vacuuming in pearls and actually cooking. Eeeek!

I realized I was safe when a few days ago I started hiding in our bedroom to watch Ryan Gosling in Crazy, Stupid, Love movies.

This Friday my hubby and I are supposed to go out on a date afternoon but I’m not sure if it’s happening now. What’s so sad is that the last time we had a date afternoon was in February. Yep. That’s pretty bad.

What’s really bad is that I can’t stand the thought of being away from my little girl at night which is why the hubs and I have “date night” in the afternoon.

I check on her countless times at night and I just know if I went out, I would be the psycho mom that would be calling the sitter every 5 minutes to see if everything’s okay.

I’m not saying you’re psycho if you do that but I am. Okay, I know this post is all over the place since I’m sick and can’t focus so I should probably say Ciao Bella.

Damn, now I want some gelato.

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This Is Hell, I mean Elle.

I’ve decided to make a name change but the web address will stay the same for a little while. I’ll let you know when that changes as soon as I figure out how to do it.

I already bought the domain name but I’m not computer savvy at all.

I’ve never really cared for my blog name and since I write about so many things, I wanted a name that doesn’t just relate to mommyhood.

I spent forever and a day trying to come up with a clever name but decided to stay with something similar.

So, This Is Mommyhood will become This Is Elle.

It’s nice to meet you.

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